Episodios

  • We Remember that Differently...So Who is Lying?

    We Remember that Differently...So Who is Lying?
    Sep 29 2025
    Today, Dan & Stephanie try to cover a difficult topic using stories that can happen with neurodiverse couples and weaving in the story of Elizabeth Holmes/ Theranos after seeing the documentary on HBO Max about remembering differently, different priorities, and lying to oneself.
    Often, the couple remembers something differently (more often than not) and gets stuck in the weeds on whether a fact is true or not true instead of solving the actual problem or coming up with a future solution from hindsight learning. Many of our couples get stuck in what is sin, what is a lie, when is this a character flaw or issue?
    Stephanie began the discussion by setting up some Gottman research that states 69% of couples' issues are perpetual and unsolvable, so what do you do?
    In neurodiverse couples, you can guarantee that you will remember situations and events differently.
    You can count on the two of you to have different perspectives and priorities- what do you do?
    Looking at the definition of a lie:
    General Definition:
    A lie is generally defined as a false statement made with the intent to deceive someone.
    It involves making a statement that the speaker knows to be untrue, to cause the listener to believe it is true.
    Lies involve the intention to deceive or omit something so as not to have a penalty or consequence.
    What to do?
    After listening to the documentary The Inventor: Out for Blood in Silicon Valley, Dan and Stephanie arrive at different places where they believe Elizabeth Holmes (no relation) is lying with intent. Is she lying to herself? Stuck in dreams or expectations that will never be? Lying to others? What do you think?
    What do you do when you remember differently and need to solve a problem, or you have differences and wants and needs and priorities?
    Dan and Stephanie also talk about the perspective gap and learning from it, and how to stay relational when you disagree.
    An older podcast called Stuck in the Weeds is mentioned- you can find that here:
    https://www.spreaker.com/episode/stuck-in-the-weeds-communication-collaboration-misfires--64597917
    Find the entire catalog here:
    https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/neurodiverse-christian-couples--4992356
    or from our home page
    www.christianneurodiversemarriage.com
    Find out what courses are available at www.holmesasr.com
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    1 h y 9 m
  • Can a NeuroDiverse Couple Truly Be Happy? Part 2

    Can a NeuroDiverse Couple Truly Be Happy? Part 2
    Sep 22 2025
    Part 2 of the " Can a NeuroDiverse Couple Truly Be Happy discussion.
    If you missed part 1, check out the catalog as of September 1!
    Colleague and Neurodiverse Couple Specialist Jodi Carlton interviewed us for her show, Your NeuroDiverse Couple Podcast, Season 5. Stephanie and Dan were featured in the Couples Who are Making It!

    We also talk about our book Uniquely Us! Get the book here: https://www.christianneurodiversemarriage.com/uniquelyus

    According to our research, 10-12% of ND Christian Couples are satisfied or thriving! We can do better! Let go of religious rules and roles and seek attachment and relationship!

    Jodi Carlton is also an expert in the field of NeuroDiverse Marriage and specializes in cases where there is a crossover of Narcissism and Autism.
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    36 m
  • For Every Action ... Mad & Meltdowns & Maybe even Mopey

    For Every Action ... Mad & Meltdowns & Maybe even Mopey
    Sep 17 2025
    In this episode of Just the Guys, the hosts — joined by a new guest, Kevin — tackle the important and nuanced topic of anger, meltdowns, and their impact on relationships. Drawing from their own neurodiverse experiences and relationships, they explore whether “meltdown” and “anger” are interchangeable, and how these emotional states affect not only the individual but everyone around them.
    They discuss how to recognize the line between frustration and a full meltdown, using vivid metaphors like pilots ignoring warnings, or weightlifters knowing their limits. The group reflects on the critical role of recognizing when you can still listen to reason versus when you’ve spiraled beyond control — and the consequences of both states.
    The conversation highlights how meltdowns are not always loud or angry; they can also manifest as emotional shutdowns. Regardless of form, every reaction has an impact on spouses, children, and the relational climate. The guys discuss the helplessness, fear, and even trauma that partners can feel in the wake of repeated meltdowns, and how chronic incidents can lead to hopelessness in relationships.
    Importantly, they emphasize the necessity of repair and introspection. Repair involves accountability, understanding the harm caused, listening to feedback without defensiveness, and working to prevent future incidents. They remind listeners that repairing trust is a team effort — built on grace, openness, and hard work — and that even if meltdowns stem from autistic traits, the behavior and its consequences still require ownership and restoration.
    The episode closes with a reminder that meltdowns and their impacts cannot simply be brushed aside — they must be acknowledged and addressed, because every action has an impact.
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    46 m
  • NeuroDiversity Training Matters for Your NeuroDiverse Marriage with NeuroDiverse Experts Panel Discussion Pt1.

    NeuroDiversity Training Matters for Your NeuroDiverse Marriage with NeuroDiverse Experts Panel Discussion Pt1.
    Sep 15 2025
    Can Neurodiverse marriages work?

    Can they be satisfying and healthy?

    Does autism really ruin marriage and family- NO!

    Does the training of your coach or counselor matter- YES!

    You will hear an introduction by neurodiverse relationship expert and coach Jodi Carlton. Jodi has been instrumental in forming a peer support group for neurodiverse couples from around the world. You will hear some panelists who have also been part of the show, and there are a few more segments we produced as a panel. Panelist work with different types of relationships and different religious or non religious backgrounds but the key point is neurodiversity training mattersIf you are a coach or counselor chaplain or clergy and you want training on ND Chritian couples reach out to me at www.christianneurovecouples.comJodi is also in our peer group putting together an organization a database of qualified professionals- so listen in our panelists discussion of neurodiverse relationship experts and specialists.

    Want to hear the rest of the podcast with Jodi- https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/how-to-get-unstuck-in-neurodiverse-partnerships-expert/id1612135248?i=1000718667695

    Want training for Christian ND couples? www.christianneurodiversemarriage.com

    Want the book Uniquely Us? https://www.christianneurodiversemarriage.com/uniquelyus
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    43 m
  • NeuroDiverse Couples' Work with Dr. Tony Attwood

    NeuroDiverse Couples' Work with Dr. Tony Attwood
    Sep 8 2025
    Today, Barbara was unable to co-host with Dr. Stephanie. For today, Dr. Stephanie is joined by Jeremy Rochford of Our Neuro Fam and Just the Guys to discuss Dr. Attwood's newest book, written by co-author Maxine Aston.

    This year marks 5 years of the ND Couples Podcast, and we welcome Dr. Tony Attwood back to the show to share his decades of experience.

    Professor Tony Attwood is a clinical psychologist who has specialized in autism spectrum disorders since he qualified as a clinical psychologist in England in 1975. He currently works in his own private practice and is also an adjunct professor at Griffith University, Queensland, and a senior consultant at the Minds and Hearts clinic in Brisbane. His book Asperger’s Syndrome – A Guide for Parents and Professionals has sold over 400,000 copies and has been translated into 27 languages. His subsequent book, The Complete Guide to Asperger’s Syndrome, published in October 2006, has sold over 300,000 copies and has been translated into 18 languages, and is one of the primary textbooks on Asperger’s syndrome. He has several subsequent books published by Jessica Kingsley Publishers, Future Horizons Inc., and Guilford Press.
    Dr. Tony has been invited to be a keynote speaker at many Australasian and International Conferences. He presents workshops and runs training courses for parents, professionals, and individuals with Asperger's syndrome all over the world and is a prolific author of scientific papers and books on the subject.
    He has worked with many thousands of individuals of all ages with Asperger's syndrome or an Autism Spectrum Disorder.
    www.tonyattwood.com.au

    The book:
    https://www.amazon.com/Relationship-Counselling-Autistic-Neurodiverse-Couples/dp/1805013025
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    1 h y 3 m
  • Can a NeuroDiverse Couple Truly Be Happy? Part 1

    Can a NeuroDiverse Couple Truly Be Happy? Part 1
    Sep 1 2025
    Colleague and Neurodiverse Couple Specialist Jodi Carlton interviewed us for her show for Season 5- Your NeuroDiverse Couple Podcast. Stephanie and Dan were featured in the Couples Who are Making It! We also discuss our book, Uniquely Us!

    Get the book here:
    https://www.christianneurodiversemarriage.com/uniquelyus
    According to our research, 10-12% of ND Christian Couples are satisfied or thriving!
    We can do better!
    Let go of religious rules and roles and seek attachment and relationship!

    Jodi Carlton is also an expert in the field of NeuroDiverse Marriage and specializes in cases where there is a crossover of Narcissism and Autism.
    https://jodicarlton.com/
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    53 m
  • Want TOTAL Intimacy in Your NeuroDiverse Christian Marriage?

    Want TOTAL Intimacy in Your NeuroDiverse Christian Marriage?
    Aug 25 2025
    We hope you have been following this entire month of podcasts on sex, porn, addiction, healthy sexuality, and now total intimacy.

    Today, we look at what total intimacy is.
    Is there such a thing as the sin of withholding? Where did that come from? Is it the wife's duty to cover or pay for her husband's sin? What is con·cu·pis·cence, and can Stephanie even say it?



    • Where did this thought originate that men must have sex every three days or three times a week?
      • Is that from the Bible?
    • What is healthy intimacy? What happens when there is duty sex?




    • Is there coercion in your marriage for sex?

    We draw today from Total Intimacy from Dr. Doug Roseneau and The Marriage You Want by the Gregoires. We also talk about attunement and attachment from Renovated by Dr. Jim Wilder.

    We read from an article from Focus on the Family: Is Sex a Need or Desire?
    https://www.focusonthefamily.com/marriage/is-sex-a-need/

    Wanna hear us on Focus on the Family's Crazy Little Thing Called Marriage Podcast?
    https://m.christianradio.com/ministry/crazy-little-thing-called-marriage/my-spouse-is-on-the-spectrum-1238637.html
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    58 m
  • What even is Healthy Christian Masculinity & Sexuality with Dr. Andrew Bauman

    What even is Healthy Christian Masculinity & Sexuality with Dr. Andrew Bauman
    Aug 18 2025
    Today, Dr. Stephanie is solo but has a discussion the church needs to hear with Dr. Andrew Bauman.
    Andrew has been on the show before, but this month our focus is on porn or sexual abuse and addiction, and what is healthy?
    Dr. Stephanie asks Dr. Andrew:
    What is an appreciation of beauty vs. "bounce the eyes" and devouring beauty?
    What is healthy masculinity?
    How has the Church devalued women?
    What is sexual intimacy?
    Dr. Stephanie mentions that many men, when porn is discovered, go into blame, shame, or defensive anger, and asks Andrew, What is happening here?
    Is porn use betrayal or infidelity?
    What needs to happen to heal and restore masculinity in the way God intended?
    About our Guest:
    Founder & Director of the Christian Counseling Center: For Sexual Health & Trauma (CCC), Dr. Andrew J. Bauman, is a therapist with a Doctorate from Northeastern University. His dissertation was on studying the impact of sexism and abuse on women in the Protestant Church. Andrew is the author of seven books, and his newest book with Baker, is called SAFE CHURCH: How to Guard Against Sexism & Abuse in Christian Communities (2025).

    Find out more about retreats at:
    https://andrewjbauman.com/
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    52 m