Do you have a family member/loved one struggling with addiction? Join Our FREE WEB CLASS! https://familyreconnectprogram.com/optin-page

If your loved one explodes in anger every time you try to help them with their addiction, this video will change how you understand what's really happening. After 15 years of sobriety, I can finally explain what was going through my head when I raged at the people trying to save my life. Their anger isn't about you - it's about shame, fear, and survival. Once you understand this, everything changes about how you approach them.

In this video, I break down: Why your offer of help triggers their rage (the shame bomb) What they're actually protecting when they push you away The real translation of "leave me alone" and "you don't understand" Specific phrases that work better than "you need help" How to stay present without enabling The person you love is still in there. Your job isn't to make them ready - it's to be there when they are.

0:00 - Why they attack when you offer help

0:45 - The shame trigger

3:30 - You're threatening their survival tool

6:00 - Anger keeps you away 8:30 - What they're really saying

10:30 - What actually works 13:00 - Final message for families

Consider our FAMILY RECONNECT PROGRAM! https://familyreconnectprogram.com/family-reconnect

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Do you have a family member/loved one struggling with addiction? Join Our FREE WEB CLASS! https://familyreconnectprogram.com/optin-page

If someone you love is struggling with alcohol and drugs, the words you choose matter more than you think. In this video, I break down the 4 phrases that push addicts deeper into their addiction — and what you should say instead.

These are the exact things my dad said to me when I was using, and I'll show you why they don't work and how to communicate in a way that actually moves the needle toward recovery. 0:00 Intro: Words That Push Addicts Away

1:15 Phrase #1: "If you loved us, you would quit"

3:45 Why conditional love destroys trust

5:20 What to say instead of questioning their love

6:30 Free Monday Workshop (Register Now)

8:10 Phrase #2: "You're weak - why can't you stop?"

11:40 Why willpower isn't the answer

13:25 What to say instead of calling them weak

15:50 Phrase #3: Bargaining - "If you do this, I'll do this"

18:30 Why rewards backfire in recovery

20:15 What to say instead of negotiating

22:40 Phrase #4: "I don't care anymore"

25:10 Why detachment works but verbalizing doesn't

27:00 What to say when you're at your breaking point

29:30 Final thoughts: Being strategic with your words

31:45 How to get support for your situation

Join my free Monday workshop: https://familyreconnectprogram.com/optin-page

5 Mistakes Every Family Makes When Helping a Loved One with Addiction 📅

Every Monday at 6:30 PM ET Need more?

Want continued support and guidence for your situation?

Consider our FAMILY RECONNECT PROGRAM! https://familyreconnectprogram.com/family-reconnect

Tom IG: https://www.instagram.com/realrecoverytalktom/

Ben IG: https://www.instagram.com/realrecoverytalkben/

RRT IG: https://www.instagram.com/realrecoverytalkpodcast/

Do you have a family member/loved one struggling with addiction? Join Our FREE WEBINAR! https://familyreconnectprogram.com/optin-page

Does your new sober life seem to be boring and mundane? Are you having a hard time finding purpose? This is an episode that you dont want to miss!

Join our Big Book Study! https://www.realrecoverytalk.com/bigbookstudy

Tom IG: https://www.instagram.com/realrecoverytalktom/

Ben IG: https://www.instagram.com/realrecoverytalkben/

RRT IG: https://www.instagram.com/realrecoverytalkpodcast/

Do you have a family member/loved one struggling with addiction? Join Our FREE WEBINAR! https://familyreconnectprogram.com/optin-page

What does it actually take to stay sober for the first 90 days?

In this episode, we break down a simple, practical framework for alcoholics and drug addicts who want real stability — not just white-knuckling it. We also speak directly to families and loved ones, sharing clear benchmarks that help you tell the difference between real progress and empty promises.

If you or someone you love is early in recovery, this episode gives you tangible actions you can start today and clarity on what healthy sobriety actually looks like.

Join our Big Book Study! https://www.realrecoverytalk.com/bigbookstudy

Tom IG: https://www.instagram.com/realrecoverytalktom/

Ben IG: https://www.instagram.com/realrecoverytalkben/

RRT IG: https://www.instagram.com/realrecoverytalkpodcast/

Do you have a family member/loved one struggling with addiction? Join Our FREE WEBINAR! https://www.realrecoverytalk.com/webinar

Join our SKOOL Group: https://www.skool.com/realrecoverytalk/about?ref=80971acc3d9f4e91bd9070fe6810e639

Join our Big Book Study! https://www.realrecoverytalk.com/bigbookstudy

Tom IG: https://www.instagram.com/realrecoverytalktom/

Ben IG: https://www.instagram.com/realrecoverytalkben/

RRT IG: https://www.instagram.com/realrecoverytalkpodcast/

Do you have a family member/loved one struggling with addiction?

Join Our FREE WEBINAR! https://familyreconnectprogram.com/optin-page

Have you ever walked away from a conversation feeling guilty, confused, or responsible for someone else's choices?

You're not imagining it — and you're not weak. In this episode of Real Recovery Talk, I break down 4 manipulation tactics addicts commonly use against the people who love them most.

These patterns are subtle, emotionally charged, and incredibly effective — especially on parents, spouses, and family members who just want to help. I've been on both sides of this. I used these tactics when I was in active addiction, and today I help families recognize them so they can stop enabling and start healing.

Join our SKOOL Group: https://www.skool.com/realrecoverytalk/about?ref=80971acc3d9f4e91bd9070fe6810e639

Join our Big Book Study! https://www.realrecoverytalk.com/bigbookstudy

Tom IG: https://www.instagram.com/realrecoverytalktom/

Ben IG: https://www.instagram.com/realrecoverytalkben/

RRT IG: https://www.instagram.com/realrecoverytalkpodcast/

Do you have a family member/loved one struggling with addiction? https://familyreconnectprogram.com/optin-page

As we head into a brand new year, many family members and loved ones are carrying a mix of hope, exhaustion, and uncertainty — especially when someone they love is struggling with addiction.

This video is not about resolutions.
It's not about fixing anyone.
And it's not about doing more.

In this episode, I share a few simple intentions you can carry into 2026 — practical, grounded ways to protect your own well-being, strengthen connection, and walk into the new year with clarity instead of fear.

Join our SKOOL Group: https://www.skool.com/realrecoverytalk/about?ref=80971acc3d9f4e91bd9070fe6810e639

Join our Big Book Study! https://www.realrecoverytalk.com/bigbookstudy

Tom IG: https://www.instagram.com/realrecoverytalktom/

Ben IG: https://www.instagram.com/realrecoverytalkben/

RRT IG: https://www.instagram.com/realrecoverytalkpodcast/

Do you have a family member/loved one struggling with addiction? https://familyreconnectprogram.com/optin-page

If it's Christmas Eve and you're lying awake right now, worried about your child, this episode is for you. While the rest of the world seems to be celebrating, many parents are quietly carrying fear, guilt, and exhaustion—wondering where their son or daughter is, if they're safe, or if things will ever change.

In this solo episode, I speak directly to parents who are struggling tonight. We talk about why Christmas Eve can feel heavier than any other night, the lies fear tells us when things get quiet, and what actually helps when you're feeling powerless. This isn't about fixing anything or having all the answers.

It's about getting through tonight—with a little more peace, perspective, and hope. If you love a child who is struggling with addiction or destructive behavior, you are not alone. And this story isn't over.

Merry Christmas.

Join our SKOOL Group: https://www.skool.com/realrecoverytalk/about?ref=80971acc3d9f4e91bd9070fe6810e639

Join our Big Book Study! https://www.realrecoverytalk.com/bigbookstudy

Tom IG: https://www.instagram.com/realrecoverytalktom/

Ben IG: https://www.instagram.com/realrecoverytalkben/

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