This week we talk about Uwe Boll's Alone in the Dark. This is our first Boll film on the pod, and now that we know what to expect, it probably won't be our last.

Here we go:

Creature critters created by crooked archeologist crawl and crush craniums! SyFy CGI! Shattering sheet glass at the showroom by 713! Sledgehammered senior! White Walker from Wuhan knows Wushu! Anubis Glyph Reader 3.5? CROSSFIREEEEEE!!! That fucking nun! Sleeping security trope! Seven second strangulation! Tara Reid! The Xenomorph connection, and much, much more on this week's episode of The Worst Movie Ever Made!

www.theworstmovieevermade.com

This week, we talk about Rudy Ray Moore's Dolemite, a film described as "The Citizen Kane of kung-fu pimpin' movies." Pretty sure we all loved it, but you'll have to listen along to find out.

Prison preventing protagonist from pimpin' puss, so parole the playa! "That's mighty black of you, reverend!" The detective downing dominoes on a dude just to be a dick! Destitute dude main-veins meth in a drug den! Dish powder muff diving! Brothel bits! Tumultuous tummy tickles! Bob clinches the Tit-Scope M title! Two Torgos knocking knees! Cocaine fish, and heroin stuffed halibuts! Squeezin' bitches out of existence! Pasty politician ass! Protagonist pimp punching his paramour mid-pounding, and much, much more on this week's episode of The Worst Movie Ever Made!

www.theworstmovieevermade.com

This week, we talk about 1985's Malibu Express. Or as we like to call it, "Tits: The Movie."

Melons and milk monsters and mammaries, oh my! Shane shamelessly shoots shower shenanigans after committing coitus with coerced consent! Blblblbl in the porn water! Penile puns! Finagling the fudge rudders! Eating furniture? Buffington buffoonery! Pulsating Playmates! Shielding from the sun with a shoe visor! Rump radar! Far too many characters to keep track of! Cody’s almost anal adventures! Car dealership desert daughter does the deed for a drive! Distinct lack of Buffington butt water, and much, much more on this week's episode of The Worst Movie Ever Made!

www.theworstmovieevermade.com