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Ok guys, if you're on Fetlife and not having much luck with the ladies… How much effort have you really put into your profile? Be honest! In this episode, I'm joined by my Dom and long-term partner, Slade, as we dive into men's profiles. Slade himself is guilty of not keeping his profile updated, and like many men, has a lot more to offer than his current profile showcases. Together, we go through his profile piece by piece, incorporating valuable input from female Fetlife users about the red and green flags they look for when connecting with men on Fetlife.

Tune in for practical tips and insights that will help you revamp your profile and increase your chances of finding meaningful connections.

Mentioned in this episode

• Follow WereDom_Slade on Fetlife
• DaemonDanes (Fetlife profile)

Contact

• Follow me on Fetlife
• Follow me on Instagram
• Follow me on X

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If you are interested in rope bondage, you need to listen to this episode! Ravel is an experienced rigger from Brisbane Australia, who understands that rope is so much more than just technical skill. With a background in theatre, dance and performing arts, Ravel talks about bringing intention to your rope scenes - that is, knowing what kind of experience and emotions you are wanting to cultivate, before you even touch a rope. Throughout the episode, Ravel offers loads of practical tips and ideas, as well as talks about the subtlety of non-verbal communication during a rope scene. I am so excited to share some of Ravel’s wisdom and experience on my show. Do not miss this one!

Mentioned in this episode

• Follow Ravel on Instagram (@ravel_shibari)
• Episode #53 - about my experience tying with Ravel
• Lucero - rigger
• Red Rigger - Brisbane Bondage and Wax Play Specialists
• Anne Bogart - The Viewpoints Book PDF (free download)
• Miss Gen (Evil Girls HQ rope school in Brisbane)
• Somatics for Rope Bottoms by Natasha Nawataeko (book)
• A Director Prepares - by Anne Bogart (book)
• And Then You Act - by Anne Bogart (book)

Contact

• Follow me on Fetlife
• Follow me on Instagram
• Follow me on X
• Watch on Youtube

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I know this is an experience on a lot of people’s ‘Fuckit lists’ so I thought I’d share some details that might help you in organising a similar experience... 🌶 In this episode I start by talking about the planning process, recognising agency, and some key factors that helped me transition into the right headspace for kinky play. I also share about what it’s like to include a CNC / free use type of role-play, as well as suggest using props to indulge all your senses. Lastly, I have a chat about what it’s like to be in an open relationship, the frustration I feel about the lack of acceptance when it comes to non-monogamy, and and the joy of “compersion.”

Mentioned in this episode

• Book a free call with me

Contact

• Follow me on Fetlife
• Follow me on Instagram
• Follow me on X
• Watch on Youtube

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I am super excited to have the incredible Chained Valkyrie on the show today. Valkyrie identifies as a pleasure sub, and as you’ll find out, there are many different kinks she enjoyed as part of her submissive identity. These include Impact, pet play, ABDL, degradation, and many more. We also cover the use of intermediate safewords, comparing yourself to others in kink, as well as the good and bad of sharing so much of yourself on Fetlife. Valkyrie is so open about her kinks and clearly has a lot of experience navigating this scene. It was an honor to have her on the show!

Mentioned in this episode

• Chained Valkyrie (Fetlife)
• Book a free call with Harley
• Crystal Chateau (Fetlife)
• Extreme Ownership by Jocko Willink (book)

Contact

• Follow me on Fetlife
• Follow me on Instagram
• Follow me on X
• Watch on Youtube

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What the hell is “fawning” and what does it have to do with kink? Well, that’s exactly what we are talking about on today’s episode. If you are someone who struggles with people pleasing to the point of crossing your own boundaries, this episode may be especially relevant to you. Also in this episode I share my recent experiences joining a yoga studio to improve core strength and flexibility for my rope bunny practice. I also share some surprising other benefits that are helping me experience more pleasure in sex.

Mentioned in this episode

• Book a free call with Harley
• What is the Fawning Trauma Response - Psychology Today

Contact

• Follow me on Fetlife
• Follow me on Instagram
• Follow me on X
• Watch on Youtube

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I have an exciting guest for you today. She is another friend from my Somatica course and her name is Jessica Langley. Jessica is a somatic sexologist, based in Colorado and she is dedicated to liberating humans from toxic shame and helping people live more authentic lives. She believes that embodied pleasure is a birthright, and she can help you reclaim your sacred eroticism. Jessica is queer and polyamorous, and if you’d like to learn more about her services you can visit her website https://versicolorcoaching.com/

Separate from her coaching business Jessica also works as a dominatrix. As we’ve never had a domme on the show before, I took this opportunity to ask her lots of questions about this! As always, I learned a lot from this chat, and I’m sure you will as well. We cover a lot of topics from polyamory, empathy, what it’s like from the Dominant perspective, and lots more.

Mentioned in this episode

• Somatica Institute
• Seeking Arangments.com
• The Empaths Survival Guide by Judith Orloff

Contact

• Book a free call with Harley (harleyrabbit.com)
• Book a free call with Jessica (versicolorcoaching.com)
• Follow Jessica on instagram @jeessicathesexwitch
• Follow me on Fetlife
• Follow me on Instagram
• Follow me on X
• Watch on Youtube

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In this week's episode I reflect on the responses I got from speaking out in episode #54. I am so grateful to everyone who has reached out to me, shared their stories, or told me the episode had an impact on them. I was very nervous about how the episode would be received and this really goes to show that most people in this community are good humans!

Also in this episode I reveal some of my favorite profiles to follow on Fetlife and Instagram! This is just one of the ways we can be proactive about cultivating a positive community around us. See the list of profile names below if you’d like to follow these amazing people yourself.

• Erenisch_Comics
• ChainedValkyrie
• Gary-whitehouse
• MrG__ and PropertyofMrG
• Thingsmyd**kdoes
• _MrV- and Darkmole
• Mostlybicpics
• Bettersx.blog
• Disabled_Eliza
• Lainey.molnar
• Kimoftheinternet

Contact

• Follow me on Fetlife
• Follow me on Instagram
• Follow me on X
• Watch on Youtube

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Setting boundaries might seem straightforward, but it’s often challenging to recognise and communicate them, especially in the context of kink. This week's episode dives into the complexities of identifying and asserting your boundaries, with a particular focus on the struggles faced by those with anxiety who may have become adept at ignoring their body’s warning signals. I share insights from my recent experiences at a weekend rope workshop that showed me that saying ‘no’ can actually lead to more fun! Special thanks to Evil Girls HQ and Miss Gen for an incredible workshop – if you have the chance to take a class with Miss Gen, don’t miss it! Links below.

• EvilGIrlsHQ website
• EvilGirlsHQ on Instagram @evilgirls.hq
• Miss Gen on Instagram @missgen_does_rope

Contact

• Follow me on Fetlife
• Follow me on Instagram
• Follow me on X
• Watch on Youtube