Fashionably Dead and Wed
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Fashionably Dead and Wed
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Narrated by:
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Jessica Almasy
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By:
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Robyn Peterman
About this listen
I know I'm already mated.... I wanna get married.
What do you get when you combine a three-headed monster named Charles; a rotund, gay, dancing Demon named Doug; a culinary disaster baked by Mother Nature; a celibate premarital councilor named Jeff; an offer from Satan that's impossible to refuse; and Steve Perry?
You get the royal wedding from hell - or, to be more accurate, possibly in hell.
All I want to do is marry the Vampyre of my dreams, with my closest friends and family in attendance. Yep, I know nuptials in the undead world are unheard of, but I'm still hanging on to my humanity if only by a thread. Being mated is great, but getting married is important to me.
Tacky invitations and cake that causes food poisoning aside, I also need to deal with the stream of Demons entering my world from mysteriously opened portals. Not to mention Angel Jeff is going to fail us on the premarital test if we participate in any nookie before the wedding. I'm trying really hard not to go bridezilla on everyone. With five days to plan the wedding, I have to figure out who's opening the portals and deal with our hostile allies who think our wedding is a farce. It's been a very difficult week - especially the no nookie part.
All I know is this: I will say "I do" on Saturday even if I have to go to hell and back to accomplish it.
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The problem with being born with expectations is the failure to live up to any. Christopher might be the antichrist, but taking over the world and leading the minions of darkness sounds like a lot of work. And while slacking is a sin his supposed dad Lucifer approves of, his lack of goals is a problem. Personally, Christopher would rather just work hard enough to make ends meet - and maybe buy a six-pack. But fate is conspiring against him.
-
5 out of 5 stars
-
Brilliant surprise
- By debbolsen on 01-10-19
By: Eve Langlais
-
The Accidental Werewolf
- Accidentally Friends, Book 1
- By: Dakota Cassidy
- Narrated by: Meredith Mitchell
- Length: 10 hrs and 15 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4 out of 5 stars 1,830
-
Performance4 out of 5 stars 1,681
-
Story4 out of 5 stars 1,680
When Marty Andrews gets bitten by a mangy mutt while walking her teacup poodle, her blond hair darkens, the hair on her legs starts growing at an alarming rate, and her mood swings put her dream job as a sales rep for Bobbie-Sue Cosmetics in serious jeopardy. Then a drool-worthy man shows up at her door claiming that he accidentally bit Marty. And since he's a werewolf, she is now, too. Thinking Keegan Flaherty is clearly insane, Marty refuses to believe a word until a kidnapping makes her realize there's more at stake than just her highlights.
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3 out of 5 stars
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Too much sex
- By CrunchySocks on 03-17-15
By: Dakota Cassidy
-
Anaconda
- By: Lauren Landish
- Narrated by: Shannon Gunn, Brooke Hayden
- Length: 6 hrs and 57 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4 out of 5 stars 1,369
-
Performance4 out of 5 stars 1,280
-
Story4 out of 5 stars 1,276
Football star and Internet sensation Gavin "Anaconda" Adams is the biggest celebrity our little town has ever seen. But I had no idea who he was when I accidentally walked in on him naked. I was shocked, seeing all of him, a cocky grin on his face. I didn't know what to do. So I ran. No matter what I do, I can't get that image out of my head. To make matters worse, Gavin wants a date with me.
-
2 out of 5 stars
-
PLEASE GET SOMEONE NEW TO READ THIS BOOK
- By Beth Oge on 09-28-18
By: Lauren Landish
-
Afterlife
- Afterlife Saga, Book 1
- By: Stephanie Hudson
- Narrated by: Rebecca Rainsford
- Length: 26 hrs and 16 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4 out of 5 stars 855
-
Performance4 out of 5 stars 773
-
Story4 out of 5 stars 770
Afterlife...just some gothic nightclub where gossip is fuelled by the presence of a rich and unearthly, handsome family or afterlife...the strange place where time seems to stand still and guests feel the presence of something more powerful held within the confines of the VIP. Keira is new to this small, cold town and is running from a past that seems to feast on her darkest memories. She finds living with her sister away from English soil to be just the ticket to the new life she is trying desperately to find.
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2 out of 5 stars
-
It is a good book yet it is NOT in many ways
- By Lexi on 11-29-16
By: Stephanie Hudson
-
Kiss & Hell
- Hell, Book 1
- By: Dakota Cassidy
- Narrated by: Charlotte North
- Length: 11 hrs
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 89
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 80
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 81
Delaney Markham has a special talent. Not only does she see dead people, she hears them. By the way, communicating with tormented spirits all day, every day really puts a kink in your love life. With no romantic entanglements to speak of, Delaney is free to use her gifts by holding seances to pay the bills. Except things go off the rails when she meets one unbelievably infuriating ghost, and as her luck would have it, he seems determined to hang around, like all the time!
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5 out of 5 stars
-
I’m sad it’s over…
- By Erica on 11-06-21
By: Dakota Cassidy
-
The Unleashing
- Call of Crows, Book 1
- By: Shelly Laurenston
- Narrated by: Johanna Parker
- Length: 11 hrs and 28 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 2,401
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 2,227
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 2,213
Kera Watson never expected to face death behind a Los Angeles coffee shop. Not after surviving two tours lugging an M16 around the Middle East. If it wasn't for her hot Viking customer showing up too late to help, nobody would even have seen her die. In uncountable years of service to the Allfather Odin, Ludvig "Vig" Rundstrom has never seen anyone kick ass with quite as much style as Kera.
-
3 out of 5 stars
-
Too Violent for this Reader
- By Aryn on 04-11-15
-
Keeping It Hot
- The Breakfast in Bed Series, Book 1
- By: Sydney Landon
- Narrated by: Nicol Zanzarella
- Length: 6 hrs and 31 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 64
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 60
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 61
Zoe Hart owns the coffee shop in one of the hottest upscale resorts in Florida, which is run by her childhood best friend, Dylan Jackson. Even though Dylan is a workaholic, he still finds time to enjoy the beautiful women who pass through his hotel - all of them except Zoe. She has been in love with Dylan for years without him noticing. But with her 30th birthday fast approaching, she realizes she can't keep pining away for a man who doesn't show the merest sign of romantic interest in her.
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4 out of 5 stars
-
Cute and entertaining
- By VAS on 09-09-24
By: Sydney Landon
-
Love and Lists
- By: Tara Sivec
- Narrated by: James Fouhey, C.J. Bloom
- Length: 5 hrs and 24 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4 out of 5 stars 408
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 374
-
Story4 out of 5 stars 376
Twenty-five-year-old Gavin Ellis has always had the love and support of his family ever since he was a little boy and couldn't stop talking about his penis. He's also always had their unsolicited advice and uncanny knack of embarrassing him at all costs. Now that he's an adult and trying to convince the love of his life to love him back, things haven't changed very much from when he was younger. When Gavin's best friend, Tyler, suggests he make a to-do list of items that will ensure he wins the girl, Gavin is 100 percent on board: after a few six packs.
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4 out of 5 stars
-
WARNING: DO NOT READ THIS IN PUBLIC.
- By Ulyana on 12-25-15
By: Tara Sivec
-
Dirty Dix
- Hard Love, Book 1
- By: Monica James
- Narrated by: Ryan West, Virginia Rose
- Length: 10 hrs and 55 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4 out of 5 stars 76
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 69
-
Story4 out of 5 stars 68
Filthy, sexy and full of surprises, Juliet is so hot she has me on fire. I’ve met my match and I can’t help going back for more. Then there’s Madison…she’s sweet, funny and awakens in me a fierce need to protect her. But I don’t do relationships. I don’t usually do the same woman twice. Juliet and Madison: Two very different women have got me completely hooked. Who will I choose? I know who I should choose, but I never said I was the hero of this story, or even the good guy. And besides, who wants to be good, when it feels so good being bad?
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1 out of 5 stars
-
SORRY.. BUT THIS STORY WASN’T FOR ME
- By CAROLYN 🔹🔹🔹🔹🔹🔹 on 03-03-19
By: Monica James
-
Volumes of the Vemreaux Complete Collection
- A Dystopian Adventure Trilogy
- By: Mary E. Twomey
- Narrated by: Madeline Mrozek
- Length: 45 hrs and 40 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4 out of 5 stars 192
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 179
-
Story4 out of 5 stars 178
This is the complete set of the Vemreaux Trilogy, including The Way, The Truth, and The Lie. In a world not divided by race, creed, or color but by blood type, Blue Anders finds herself on the wrong end of fortune's mercy. Born with a lesser blood type, Blue is raised in The Way, a work camp for A-bloods.
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4 out of 5 stars
-
Religious overtones and emotionalally damaged protagonist
- By Frank on 05-16-16
By: Mary E. Twomey
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Friend-Zoned
- By: Belle Aurora
- Narrated by: Eleanor Gwyn, Douglas Berger
- Length: 12 hrs and 6 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4 out of 5 stars 154
-
Performance4 out of 5 stars 144
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 143
Nikolai Leokov never thought he'd fall in love with the only girl he's ever befriended. Valentina Tomic has issues with commitment after the ultimate betrayal. When Tina decides to make broody Nik's day better, she never thought she would end up friends with the hard man. Nik has never had a woman be so affectionate to him without expecting something in return.
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2 out of 5 stars
-
Highly disappointing!
- By Wen on 06-04-15
By: Belle Aurora
-
Love Unscripted
- The Love Series, Book 1
- By: Tina Reber
- Narrated by: Madeleine Maby
- Length: 22 hrs and 35 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4 out of 5 stars 1,268
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 1,159
-
Story4 out of 5 stars 1,163
Ryan Christensen just wanted to be an actor. Never in his wildest dreams did he imagine a life where fans would chase him, paparazzi would stalk him, and Hollywood studios would want to own him. While filming in Seaport, Rhode Island, Ryan ducks into a neighborhood bar for a quick escape from legions of screaming fans... and finds much more than he expected. Nursing a recent heartbreak, Taryn Mitchell believes men are best kept at a safe distance. But when Ryan Christensen unexpectedly bursts through the front door of her pub, she can’t help but be drawn in
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5 out of 5 stars
-
A WELL WRITTEN AND NARRATED LOVE STORY
- By CAROLYN 🔹🔹🔹🔹🔹🔹 on 11-15-12
By: Tina Reber
-
Good Intentions
- By: Elliott Kay
- Narrated by: Tess Irondale
- Length: 22 hrs and 3 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 4,166
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 3,826
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 3,826
He knew it was a dumb stunt from the start. A midnight run through a cemetery to impress a couple of girls isn't the stuff of legend, but Alex Carlisle longs to escape the crushing mediocrity of life after high school. Then, he stumbles upon the ritual, the cultists, and two bound and bloodied women. Alex intervenes, and the ritual blows up in his face, leaving him bound to them both: Rachel and Lorelei, an angel and a succubus.
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5 out of 5 stars
-
Read the Warning Label!
- By C. Williams on 08-31-15
By: Elliott Kay
-
Undead and Unwed
- Queen Betsy, Book 1
- By: MaryJanice Davidson
- Narrated by: Nancy Wu
- Length: 9 hrs and 10 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4 out of 5 stars 2,954
-
Performance4 out of 5 stars 1,866
-
Story4 out of 5 stars 1,859
Waking up in a tacky coffin and wearing off-brand shoes, Betsy Taylor can't believe the horrible turn her life has taken; then she discovers she's a vampire. Soon, Betsy becomes a participant in a power struggle between the forces of darkness. With only her friend Jessica and the hunky vampire Sinclair to help her, this new "Queen of Vampires" will have a tough time getting her afterlife straight.
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3 out of 5 stars
-
Great Concept / Annoying Character
- By Vanessa on 07-28-09
-
Bear Necessities
- Halle Shifters, Book 1
- By: Dana Marie Bell
- Narrated by: Samantha Cook
- Length: 8 hrs and 44 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 253
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 231
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 231
Once a Bear sets his mind on a mission, it's best to stay out of his way. Alexander "Bunny" Bunsun is that Bear. Something's not right with his cousin Chloe, and he's come to Halle, PA, to sort it out, turn his Harley around and head home to Oregon. Until an enticing scent lures him into the local tattoo shop. There she is. An inked, Southern-drawled she-Wolf with lime-green hair. His perfect mate.
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5 out of 5 stars
-
Worth the wait.
- By Poppy on 04-25-17
By: Dana Marie Bell
-
Capture
- By: Rachel Van Dyken
- Narrated by: Brittany Pressley, Peter Coleman
- Length: 7 hrs and 43 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 387
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 363
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 364
Losing your ability to speak at the age of 17; it's not normal or fair. But trauma has a way of throwing normality out the window. Dani lives anything but a normal life: her sister is married to one of the biggest names in Hollywood, her best friends are rock stars, and she has more love around her than most people experience in a lifetime. But that doesn't change the fact their parents are dead, or that it's her fault. It seems her new normal is being a mute, living on the inside, unable to actually communicate on the outside.
-
5 out of 5 stars
-
Great story
- By TeaReads on 08-05-17
By: Rachel Van Dyken
-
Cursed
- By: Tara Brown
- Narrated by: Julie McKay
- Length: 10 hrs and 40 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 950
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 875
-
Story4 out of 5 stars 869
Someone is drugging the fairest of them all and hurting them in the dark corners of the forests around Port Mackenzie - shrouding the town in mystery and darkness. But nothing is as it seems. In the dark corners of the small town there is also a light, a cure to what ails the sick. But everything comes at a cost, a price that must be paid. Aimee James discovers that cost the moment she dies. She discovers there are worse things than dying. She finds herself cursed.
-
1 out of 5 stars
-
can't even finish it
- By Sharada on 07-11-18
By: Tara Brown
-
Absinthe of the Heart
- Sins of the Heart, Book 1
- By: Monica James
- Narrated by: Vanessa Edwin
- Length: 11 hrs and 43 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 102
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 93
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 93
London Sinclair was the boy my mother warned me about for as long as I can remember. His name alone has brought my family nothing but shame and suffering, so it’s no surprise we’ve been sworn enemies since the first moment we met. With his bedroom eyes and cocky smile, he has all the girls under his spell. I have one more year of school left, and then I’m home free because I’m guarding a secret, one I’m ashamed to keep. The boy who is completely off-limits is the one who drives me, Holland Brooks, wild. I want London, and I think…he wants me, too.
-
5 out of 5 stars
-
A BEAUTIFUL BATTLEFIELD.. & A 5 ⭐️ TRIUMPH
- By CAROLYN 🔹🔹🔹🔹🔹🔹 on 10-11-19
By: Monica James
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4 out of 5 stars
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The first half of a book😡
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What listeners say about Fashionably Dead and Wed
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
-
Performance5 out of 5 stars
-
Story5 out of 5 stars
- Snoopyvet
- 09-06-17
Pee in your pants laughs
Would you listen to Fashionably Dead and Wed again? Why?
Yes cause it made me smile and laugh in a time I really need to. You just can't help but laugh while listening
What was one of the most memorable moments of Fashionably Dead and Wed?
When Satan played the piano at the Wedding
What does Jessica Almasy bring to the story that you wouldn’t experience if you just read the book?
she does a wonderful job with the different character voices
Did you have an extreme reaction to this book? Did it make you laugh or cry?
It made me laugh so much I almost peed in my pants
Any additional comments?
Well worth a listen this series is just outstanding and the audio version brings just a tad bit more then the ebook version
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
-
Performance5 out of 5 stars
-
Story5 out of 5 stars
- April Kozeluh
- 04-19-17
Hilarious
I think these books are hilarious. I love the narrator, Jessica Almasy, is very funny and has a great delivery.
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Overall4 out of 5 stars
-
Performance5 out of 5 stars
-
Story4 out of 5 stars
- Anonymous User
- 12-30-19
delightful
Jessica Almay's narrative is so delightful and laugh out loud she really makes this series.
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
-
Performance5 out of 5 stars
-
Story5 out of 5 stars
- Victoria Slovinski
- 12-11-23
Great Story
I love the characters and am grateful for all the humor! Never stop this series! It rocks!
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- K. Liguori
- 12-14-16
Omg Astrid and Ethan get married not with out craziness
Loved this story so upset it's over, laughed my ass off. Love that all the characters come to life for their wedding. Great book awesome author!!
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1 person found this helpful
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- RandomReader
- 01-03-17
LOVE THIS SERIES😍
Robyn Peterman & Jessica Almasy are a one click author/narrator combo for me. Thanks for such a great series. If you like Katie MacAlister, Molly Harper, Darynda Jones, et al...check this series out you will not regret it!
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
- Megan Perez
- 04-01-17
Love love Robyn Peterman!
I love this series! a new twist on paranormal romance. Graphic, in an outlandish sort of way, profane and hysterical!!!
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Cyn or Peter
- 05-25-20
funtastic
I just love GG lol. Pam totally cracks me up. The wedding planning was hilarious. Moving on to the next in line.
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance4 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Amazon Customer
- 12-11-16
love all of her books!!!
If you are in to silly and ridiculous then you will Love this author. I am extremely goofy and have everyone of her books this series is great so is the Magic and Mayhem series as well. If you are new to the series start with Fashionably dead book one
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4 people found this helpful
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Elisa Reindl
- 01-15-17
Love this series!!
I laughed so hard! The story was entertaining, and the narration was excellent. I didn't want it to end . . . Of course, she left it open for more stories . . .
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