They Ate the Waitress? Audiobook By D.N. Schmidt cover art

They Ate the Waitress?

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They Ate the Waitress?

By: D.N. Schmidt
Narrated by: Christopher J Dusky
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About this listen

A delightfully funny murder mystery full of wit, wordplay, and cannibalism. Nick Wergild is a private detective armed only with his wits and an atomic-powered electroshock gun.

One evening, while under the influence of powerful hallucinogens, he is hired to investigate a murder at a local restaurant called “Hand to Mouth”. It seems the customers ate one of the staff. And she didn’t even volunteer for the job.

Nick has to find a way to solve the case without a body or a crime scene. Along the way, he also has to survive hit men, bomb-throwing security guards, bad puns, and a homicidal politician.

Will he live long enough to solve the case? Can you really trust the owner of a restaurant for cannibals? What does human flesh really taste like? And why does furniture keep falling from the sky?

If you love humor, mysteries, and anything weird, you don't want to miss this!

©2019 D.N. Schmidt (P)2020 D.N. Schmidt
Detective Fiction Literature & Fiction Mystery Private Investigators Funny Witty
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A witty and suspenseful murder mystery!

This was an enjoyable story about a private detective. As Nick was hired to solve a murder, he himself was thrown into his own unsolved mystery of who wanted him dead. With multiple suspects, he must face interrogating each one as he tries to stay alive in the process. You won't be disappointed!

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    4 out of 5 stars

Funny dark humor.

In a future version of the U.S., the government has been utterly and completely abolished. That means everything is legal, including a luxury restaurant catering to wealthy cannibals.

Yes, cannibals. f you don’t have the stomach for constant jokes about cannibalism, this isn’t for you.

But if you're a dark humor aficionado, the jokes come fast and furious, and the good news is, they’re hilarious. I’m not sure if a single paragraph passed without a wisecrack, and they were almost always funny.

Our main character is Nick Wergild, a private investigator or, in the parlance of this world, a manhunter. After an opening scene involving the arrest of a former politician from before the abolishment of government (including capturing the suspect because he flees into a brothel where they have an abundance of means to restrain people), Nick is hired to investigate the death of Renee Flockhardt, a waitress at the cannibal restaurant. Unfortunately there are no remains because … well, you can imagine.

I enjoyed this more for the jokes than for the mystery. On the down side, if you have a sacred cow, it’s going to get gored in here.

I laughed out loud through most of the book. If you have the stomach for it, I strongly suspect you will too.

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