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"You Should Be Grateful"
- Stories of Race, Identity, and Transracial Adoption
- Narrado por: Angela Tucker
- Duración: 7 h y 26 m
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Resumen del Editor
An adoption expert and transracial adoptee herself examines the unique perspectives and challenges these adoptees have as they navigate multiple cultures
“Your parents are so amazing for adopting you! You should be grateful that you were adopted.”
Angela Tucker is a Black woman, adopted from foster care by white parents. She has heard this microaggression her entire life, usually from well-intentioned strangers who view her adoptive parents as noble saviors. She is grateful for many aspects of her life, but being transracially adopted involves layers of rejection, loss, and complexity that cannot be summed up so easily.
In “You Should Be Grateful,” Tucker centers the experiences of adoptees to share deeply personal stories, well-researched history, and engrossing anecdotes from mentorship sessions with adopted youth. These perspectives challenge the fairy-tale narrative of adoption, giving way to a fuller story that explores the impacts of racism, classism, family, love, and belonging.
Reseñas de la Crítica
“A captivating memoir that also offers an important counterpoint to voyeurism and saviorism in the adoption process.”—Kirkus Reviews
“This deeply personal story is also a passionate call to rethink the way we manage and talk about adoption in America.”—Booklist
“Tucker’s story and the stories of the adoptees she features gives readers access to thoughts adoptees have but might too afraid to tell others or what they talk about amongst themselves.”—International Examiner
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The adoption business was founded on secrecy and lies. American Baby lays out how a lucrative and exploitative industry removed children from their birth mothers and placed them with hopeful families, fabricating stories about infants' origins and destinations, then closing the door firmly between the parties forever. Adoption agencies and other organizations that purported to help pregnant women struck unethical deals with doctors and researchers for pseudoscientific "assessments," and shamed millions of women into surrendering their children.
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I felt the love of my birth mom...
- De Mary H. en 02-03-21
De: Gabrielle Glaser
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Twenty Things Adopted Kids Wish Their Adoptive Parents Knew
- De: Sherrie Eldridge
- Narrado por: Rosemary Benson
- Duración: 6 h y 58 m
- Versión completa
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Historia
The voices of adopted children are poignant, questioning. And they tell a familiar story of loss, fear, and hope. This extraordinary book, written by a woman who was adopted herself, gives voice to children's unspoken concerns, and shows adoptive parents how to free their kids from feelings of fear, abandonment, and shame. With warmth and candor, Sherrie Eldridge reveals the 20 complex emotional issues you must understand to nurture the child you love.
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The glass is half empty.
- De stephen blackwell en 07-19-24
De: Sherrie Eldridge
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Relinquished
- The Politics of Adoption and the Privilege of American Motherhood
- De: Gretchen Sisson
- Narrado por: Angel Pean, Emily Norman, Katie Koster, y otros
- Duración: 10 h y 28 m
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A powerful decade-long study of adoption in the age of Roe, revealing the grief of the American mothers for whom the choice to parent was never real.
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Deeply moving and well researched
- De tessa raphael en 06-20-24
De: Gretchen Sisson
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What White Parents Should Know About Transracial Adoption
- An Adoptee's Perspective on Its History, Nuances, and Practices
- De: Melissa Guida-Richards, Paula Guida - foreword
- Narrado por: Stacy Gonzalez
- Duración: 6 h y 39 m
- Versión completa
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If you're the White parent of a transracially or internationally adopted child, you may have been told that if you try your best and work your hardest, good intentions and a whole lot of love will be enough to give your child the security, attachment, and nurturing family life they need to thrive. The only problem? It's not true. What White Parents Need to Know About Transracial Adoption breaks down the dynamics that frequently fly under the radar of the whitewashed, happily-ever-after adoption stories we hear so often.
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How I can relate to my Asian adopted daughters life
- De Anonymous User en 11-27-23
De: Melissa Guida-Richards, y otros
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Adoption Unfiltered
- Revelations from Adoptees, Birth Parents, Adoptive Parents, and Allies
- De: Sara Easterly, Kelsey Vander Vliet Ranyard, Lori Holden, y otros
- Narrado por: Sara Easterly
- Duración: 8 h y 45 m
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Healing isn't possible, though, without first uncovering the hurts—starting with adoption's central players: adoptees, who are so often in pain, suffering from what the latest brain science validates as the long-term emotional effects of separation trauma. By encouraging others to vulnerably share their stories, the authors discover that adoptees aren't the only ones in the adoption constellation who are hurting. Birth parents regularly shut down after being shut out by adoptive parents.
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A must read / listen for any prospective adoptive parents
- De Mandy G. en 05-08-24
De: Sara Easterly, y otros
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I Would Meet You Anywhere
- A Memoir (Machete)
- De: Susan Kiyo Ito
- Narrado por: Kathleen Li
- Duración: 8 h y 12 m
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Growing up with adoptive nisei parents, Susan Kiyo Ito knew only that her birth mother was Japanese American and her father White. But finding and meeting her birth mother in her early 20s was only the beginning of her search for answers, history, and identity. Though the two share a physical likeness, an affinity for ice cream, and a relationship that sometimes even feels familial, there is an ever-present tension between them, as a decades-long tug-of-war pits her birth mother’s desire for anonymity against Ito’s need to know her origins, to see and be seen.
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Lovely and heart-wrenching
- De Patti Simmons en 11-14-23
De: Susan Kiyo Ito
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American Baby
- A Mother, a Child, and the Shadow History of Adoption
- De: Gabrielle Glaser
- Narrado por: Kathe Mazur, Gabrielle Glaser, Margaret Katz
- Duración: 10 h y 37 m
- Versión completa
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General
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Historia
The adoption business was founded on secrecy and lies. American Baby lays out how a lucrative and exploitative industry removed children from their birth mothers and placed them with hopeful families, fabricating stories about infants' origins and destinations, then closing the door firmly between the parties forever. Adoption agencies and other organizations that purported to help pregnant women struck unethical deals with doctors and researchers for pseudoscientific "assessments," and shamed millions of women into surrendering their children.
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I felt the love of my birth mom...
- De Mary H. en 02-03-21
De: Gabrielle Glaser
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Twenty Things Adopted Kids Wish Their Adoptive Parents Knew
- De: Sherrie Eldridge
- Narrado por: Rosemary Benson
- Duración: 6 h y 58 m
- Versión completa
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General
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Narración:
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Historia
The voices of adopted children are poignant, questioning. And they tell a familiar story of loss, fear, and hope. This extraordinary book, written by a woman who was adopted herself, gives voice to children's unspoken concerns, and shows adoptive parents how to free their kids from feelings of fear, abandonment, and shame. With warmth and candor, Sherrie Eldridge reveals the 20 complex emotional issues you must understand to nurture the child you love.
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The glass is half empty.
- De stephen blackwell en 07-19-24
De: Sherrie Eldridge
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The Connected Parent
- Real-Life Strategies for Building Trust and Attachment
- De: Lisa Qualls, Karyn Purvis PhD
- Narrado por: Lisa Qualls
- Duración: 4 h y 42 m
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Renowned child-development expert Dr. Karyn Purvis gives you practical advice and powerful tools you can use to encourage secure attachment in your family. You will benefit from Karyn’s decades of clinical research and real-world experience. Coauthor Lisa Qualls demonstrates how you can successfully implement these strategies in your home, just as she did in hers. You will learn how to simplify your approach using scripts, nurture your child, combat chronic fear, teach respect, and develop other valuable tools to facilitate a healing connection with your child.
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An holistic approach to relational health
- De K & J en 02-11-23
De: Lisa Qualls, y otros
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Adoption Trauma
- Pain, Rejection, Fear! But There Is Hope
- De: Fiona Myles
- Narrado por: Fiona Myles
- Duración: 2 h y 13 m
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Do you want to take a step towards confidence, acceptance, and well-being? This audiobook is my inward look at adoption trauma with some helpful tips that I have used over the past six years to help me overcome the feelings of unworthiness, anger, fear, and rejection that plagued me for 50 years.
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Very relatable and validating
- De Shannon en 12-30-23
De: Fiona Myles
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All You Can Ever Know
- A Memoir
- De: Nicole Chung
- Narrado por: Janet Song
- Duración: 6 h y 42 m
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Nicole Chung was born premature, placed for adoption by her Korean parents, and raised by a white family in a sheltered Oregon town. From childhood, she heard the story of her adoption as a comforting, prepackaged myth. She believed that her biological parents had made the ultimate sacrifice in the hope of giving her a better life, that forever feeling slightly out of place was her fate as a transracial adoptee. But as Nicole grew up, she wondered if the story she'd been told was the whole truth.
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Disappointed
- De Senshin en 10-11-18
De: Nicole Chung
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Reclaim Compassion
- The Adoptive Parent's Guide to Overcoming Blocked Care with Neuroscience and Faith
- De: Lisa Qualls, Melissa Corkum
- Narrado por: Lisa C. Qualls, Melissa Corkum
- Duración: 3 h y 33 m
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Is your parenting journey turning out differently than you imagined? You had so much love to give, but now you feel ashamed and bewildered by your lack of compassion. You may be experiencing blocked care—a self-protective mechanism in your nervous system that makes it difficult to connect with your child and maintain compassion. When it happens, it’s like your heart seems to have left the relationship. But the good news is you are not a bad parent. You can heal from blocked care, and compassion can be rekindled in your heart.
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Adoption Parenting - Expectation vs Reality
- De Jennifer en 07-29-24
De: Lisa Qualls, y otros
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You Don't Look Adopted
- De: Anne Heffron
- Narrado por: Anne Heffron
- Duración: 5 h y 55 m
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Can writing your story save your life? I should have come with a manual. My parents thought they were getting one thing when they adopted me - a baby of their own - when what they got was a human being with a story of her own. As a child, I traded safety for silence. As an adult, I had no idea who I was, why I quit nearly everything I started, why I struggled with things that came more easily to my friends (jobs, relationships, finances, self-esteem), why I seemed hell-bent on throwing myself away.
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Courageous and raw
- De Christine Warmus Murphy en 08-30-19
De: Anne Heffron
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It Takes More Than Love
- A Christian Guide to Navigating the Complexities of Cross-Cultural Adoption
- De: Brittany Salmon
- Narrado por: Carrie Farris
- Duración: 4 h y 56 m
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Being an adoptive parent is hard enough. But when your family is multiracial, things get even trickier. Parenting transracially doesn’t come naturally nor does it just happen with time. Love is essential, yet by itself, love isn’t enough. Cross-cultural parenting also takes intentionality, listening, learning, growing, repenting, changing...then starting all over and doing it again. It’s hard work! And yet, when an adoptive family honors the ethnic heritages of their children, the whole family gets to see the beauty of a gloriously creative God.
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Best adoption book out right now
- De Elizabeth Alignamath en 02-20-23
De: Brittany Salmon
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Surviving the White Gaze
- A Memoir
- De: Rebecca Carroll
- Narrado por: Rebecca Carroll
- Duración: 7 h y 28 m
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Rebecca Carroll grew up the only Black person in her rural New Hampshire town. Adopted at birth by artistic parents who believed in peace, love, and zero population growth, her early childhood was loving and idyllic - and yet she couldn’t articulate the deep sense of isolation she increasingly felt as she grew older. Everything changed when she met her birth mother, a young White woman, who consistently undermined Carroll’s sense of her blackness and self-esteem.
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Outstanding
- De Steve Shirley en 02-08-21
De: Rebecca Carroll
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Parenting Children of Trauma
- The Foster-Adoption Guide to Understanding Attachment Disorder
- De: Marcy Pusey
- Narrado por: Dana DiAngelo
- Duración: 6 h y 4 m
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Many foster and adoptive parents are raising children with complex emotional trauma, desperate for answers to heal their families. Caught off guard, these families find themselves with shattered dreams, shattered homes, and shattered hearts, with nowhere to turn for answers. Extended family members, friends, and the greater community don't understand the challenges and can, sometimes, add to the problems these families face, prolonging the healing process for all.
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religious and designed to terrify
- De heather frady en 04-01-23
De: Marcy Pusey
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Walk to Beautiful
- The Power of Love and a Homeless Kid Who Found the Way
- De: Jimmy Wayne, Ken Abraham - contributor
- Narrado por: Gabe Wicks
- Duración: 9 h y 43 m
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That’s the real life story of country music star Jimmy Wayne. It’s a miracle that Jimmy survived being hungry and homeless, bouncing in and out of the foster care system, and sleeping in the streets. But he didn’t just overcome great adversity in his life; he now uses his country music platform to help children everywhere, especially teenagers in foster care who are about to age out of the system. Walk to Beautiful is the powerfully emotive account of Jimmy’s horrendous childhood and the love shown him by Russell and Bea Costner, the elderly couple who gave him a stable home and provided the chance to complete his education. Jimmy says of Bea, “She changed every cell in my body.”
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Herein are we all...
- De PLCC en 11-22-16
De: Jimmy Wayne, y otros
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Torn Apart
- How the Child Welfare System Destroys Black Families--and How Abolition Can Build a Safer World
- De: Dorothy Roberts
- Narrado por: Dorothy Roberts, Janina Edwards
- Duración: 11 h y 49 m
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Many believe the child welfare system protects children from abuse. But as Torn Apart uncovers, this system is designed to punish Black families. Drawing on decades of research, legal scholar and sociologist Dorothy Roberts reveals that the child welfare system is better understood as a “family policing system” that collaborates with law enforcement and prisons to oppress Black communities. Child protection investigations ensnare a majority of Black children, putting their families under intense state surveillance and regulation.
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Important to Read. Unfinished Work.
- De Amazon Woman en 04-12-22
De: Dorothy Roberts
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The Girl I Am, Was, and Never Will Be
- A Speculative Memoir of Transracial Adoption
- De: Shannon Gibney
- Narrado por: Shannon Gibney
- Duración: 5 h y 10 m
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Dream Country author Shannon Gibney returns with The Girl I Am, Was, and Never Will Be, a book woven from her true story of growing up as a mixed-Black transracial adoptee and fictional story of Erin Powers, the name Shannon was given at birth, a child raised by a white, closeted lesbian.
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What a blessing this young woman is to both families!!
- De Bridget en 01-31-23
De: Shannon Gibney
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Finding Chika
- A Little Girl, an Earthquake, and the Making of a Family
- De: Mitch Albom
- Narrado por: Mitch Albom
- Duración: 4 h y 54 m
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Chika Jeune was born three days before the devastating earthquake that decimated Haiti in 2010. She spent her infancy in a landscape of extreme poverty, and when her mother died giving birth to a baby brother, Chika was brought to The Have Faith Haiti Orphanage that Albom operates in Port Au Prince. With no children of their own, the 40-plus children who live, play, and go to school at the orphanage have become family to Mitch and his wife, Janine. But at age five, Chika is suddenly diagnosed with something a doctor there says "no one in Haiti can help you with."
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BUY READ AND RECOMMEND THIS BOOK
- De The Birds. en 11-05-19
De: Mitch Albom
Lo que los oyentes dicen sobre "You Should Be Grateful"
Calificaciones medias de los clientesReseñas - Selecciona las pestañas a continuación para cambiar el origen de las reseñas.
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- Anon
- 05-14-23
This incredible book gives voice to the voiceless.
As a transracial adoptee, with a closed adoption, I know too well the journey Angela shared. Truly heartening to hear I’m not alone in my vast emotions for my birth and adopted family.
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- C. Gorman
- 06-29-23
Eye opening
Thank you for this wonderful insight. I am enriched buy your story that I will carry with me.
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- D.B
- 11-11-23
Riveting Autobiography of a Trans Racial Adoptee
Everyone and their grandmother should read this book. A consice yet thoughtful exploration of the stories that connect us all interweaving realities of poverty, disconnection, and the small steps it takes to bring us closer to healing.
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- Kazali
- 01-14-24
You SHOULD read this
Eye opening, heart opening, mind opening look into adoption. Centering the adoptee and birth mother while shining a light on a system that needs recalibrating. Angela’s story and scholarship is a master class in humanity.
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- Myrielle
- 04-23-23
This is a 5 Star Book
Angela has such depth and honesty when speaking about her adoption journey. She has a wealth of knowledge and experience which I am able to utilize as an adoptee and an adoption professional. I thoroughly enjoyed the book and I finished feeling as though I know Angela personally. She also narrated her book which is a huge plus for me. This is a five star read and I look forward to reading more of her books in the future. Assuming she will be writing more.
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- Anonymous User
- 10-10-23
amazing
I shared so many emotions and deep-rooted feelings with this book and the story's author. Thank you for writing this.
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- Emma Stevens/Linda Campbell Pevac
- 11-15-23
Perspective
Please listen to this transracial adoptee! Angela’s lived experience documented in this bold memoir will help bring awareness to the complexities of adoption as well as to the additional struggles a transracial adoptee must learn to navigate.
I’m also an adoptee. There were many similarities of Angela’s story to mine. One being that my birth/first mother was also not forthcoming about the details of my adoption when I met her, nor was she about the identity of my birth father. What I misinterpreted to be her resistance, was actually her unresolved trauma that had “frozen” her in time. She honestly didn’t remember.
Another similarity was Angela’s mention of her closed adoption and how much time she spent in her “ghost kingdom” while growing up, I, too, spent an inordinate amount of time fantasizing about who my mother was—instead of being given the chance to deal with life on life’s terms. To see my birth mother as a real person instead of needing to make up a fantastical one. Angela writes about how the closed adoption system damaged her by denying her access to her medical history, pertinent background information, and to her biological family.
Being a same race adoptee, it was important and enlightening to me to learn of the many additional layers a transracial adoptee must face. Thanks to Angela, I now have a deeper level of understanding.
Emma Stevens aka Linda Campbell Pevac
Author of “A Fire Is Coming” and “The Gathering Place: An Adoptee’s Story”
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- Stacey Duncan
- 05-09-23
A mind opening book
As an adoptive mom of a transracial adoptee, this book gave me so much insight and thought provoking dialog for my family. I believe this will make my daughters life a bit less challenging.
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- Chaching
- 11-11-23
phenomenal.
As a transracial adoptee and an adoptee in reunion in my 20s this is so spot on. So much I found words for and relatable on different levels. So intricately and beautifully written.
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- Tess
- 07-30-23
Unexpectedly Healing
As a transracial adult adoptee, raised without the resources to process my experience, I didn’t know what to expect from this. Not only did I uncover the intricacies and complexities of feelings I never knew how to describe but found new agency to explore my journey. After reading this I found some resources for BIPOC adoptees raised by white families and feel like maybe as a 29 year old, I finally have the chance to meet people like me. Thank you Angela.
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