A few years ago, I realized that one of my friendship patterns was actually kind of a problem.

I’d show up for my friends as Superwoman, bragging that I could (and would) drop everything and do anything for my friends – even if it meant betraying myself and my own needs. Then, when I really needed help, I’d never ask for it.

I think we all have friendship patterns and tendencies. Some are good. Some are not. What’s important is taking a step back to determine whether they serve our friendships.

We can talk about this stuff in theory, but hearing real stories makes all the difference, and today’s guest, Deb Blum, the CEO and founder of the Whole Soul Way, shares her own tales with truth and vulnerability, from her historical wariness of female friendships to the midlife realization that made all the difference.

In this episode you’ll hear about:

• Becoming friends with people who feel “safe enough” and the feeling of being “too much” – plus, the difference between fitting in and belonging
• Mismatches in relationships vs. mismatches in the moment, and how sometimes people just aren’t in the same places at the same time
• The friendship patterns Deb finally realized midlife that were impacting her relationships and how she shifted those to create better ones
• The impact our parents have on how we interact with friends and how close we allow people to get to us
• The damage it can do to friendships when you don’t share your whole truth – and how people pleasing can actually be a bit of a betrayal

Resources & Links:

Learn about the Whole Soul Way and follow Deb Blum on Facebook and Instagram.

Dive deeper into these ideas and listen to Episode 15, about managing differences in friendships.

Like what you hear? Visit my website, leave me a voicemail, and follow me on Instagram and TikTok!

Want to take this conversation a step further? Send this episode to a friend. Tell them you found it interesting and use what we just talked about as a conversation starter the next time you and your friend hang out!

What are your friendship beliefs? What stories do you tell yourself about your friendships?

Today’s episode might be one of the most important I’ve ever recorded because it gets at the heart of so many people’s struggles: core beliefs about friendship.

Here, I’m joined by Sarah Siegert, founder of Friendships Abroad. Inspired by her own experience moving from Hamburg to London, Sarah is a friendship coach who helps people living abroad create meaningful connections and overcome their loneliness.

As Sarah points out in today’s episode, our relationships start with us. If we want healthy friendships, we have to be willing to do the inner work first.

In this episode you’ll hear about:

• Sarah’s experience moving from Germany to London in 2019 and her struggles to fit in within a whole new country
• Doing the inner work and training our brains to see the similarities between each other instead of the differences
• Creating new friendship habits and developing close relationships within a friendship group
• Introverts vs. extroverts, recharging your social batteries, and being intentional about what you’re looking for in friendships

Resources & Links:

Check out Episode 42 about friendship trios, which is about developing a close friendship within a group and follow Sarah on Instagram and visit her website.

Like what you hear? Visit my website, leave me a voicemail, and follow me on Instagram and TikTok!

Want to take this conversation a step further? Send this episode to a friend. Tell them you found it interesting and use what we just talked about as a conversation starter the next time you and your friend hang out!

I just want to make friends who are in the same stage of life as me.

In this business, I hear some of the same phrases over and over, and this is one of them. I love that goal, and it’s a big part of what I talk about on the podcast. But recently, I’ve also noticed a trend in which people are seeking friends who are in DIFFERENT life stages.

So that’s what I’m talking about today. Why would you want friends in different life stages than you? And more importantly, how do you make and maintain friendships with people whose current life circumstances are so different from yours?

Personally, I’m looking for a walking buddy, and I feel like that perfect someone might not be a fellow entrepreneur in their mid-30s. What friendships are you looking for in your own life? How might people in different life stages add some richness to your social wellness?

In this episode you’ll hear about:

• The tendency to lean on sameness or perceived similarity in friendships – and the similarities you can still find between friends in different life stages
• Why sometimes it’s actually easier to spend time with people in different life stages because they have different time constraints
• The opportunities for sharing wisdom and learning when you’re friends with people who are older or younger than you
• How sometimes having friends in different stages of life alleviates pressure to act or be a certain way – plus, ideas on how to find these friends!

Resources & Links:

Learn about my Wheel of Connection framework and be sure to check out Episode 77 about female friendships and Episode 15, about managing differences in friendships.

Like what you hear? Visit my website, leave me a voicemail, and follow me on Instagram and TikTok!

Want to take this conversation a step further? Send this episode to a friend. Tell them you found it interesting and use what we just talked about as a conversation starter the next time you and your friend hang out!