Episode Summary

In this heartfelt episode of the Helping Families Be Happy podcast, host Christopher Robbins converses with author Abigail Calkin, exploring the nuanced world of military families, love, relationships, and the challenges of PTSD. Abigail shares her journey as a military spouse and discusses her book, *The Soul of My Soldier*. The discussion also delves into the importance of understanding and supporting veterans with PTSD, and the therapeutic power of writing and poetry in healing and coping with the aftermath of military service.

Episode Highlights

- **00:00:10 - Introduction**: Christopher Robbins introduces the podcast, focusing on the complex dynamics of family, love, and relationships. He outlines the episode's objective of understanding and supporting military families through the lens of Abigail Calkin's experiences and literary work.

- **00:01:14 - Abigail Calkin's Background**: Robbins details Abigail Calkin's achievements and publications, highlighting her literary contributions that span poetry, fiction, non-fiction, and analyses of behavioral psychology. Calkin's diverse work reflects a deep exploration of human emotion, relationships, and the psychological impacts of military life.

- **00:02:32 - Welcome to Abigail Calkin**: Robbins warmly welcomes Abigail Calkin to the podcast. This introduction sets the stage for an intimate and profound discussion about military life, love, and the power of writing.

- **00:02:45 - Building a Life in Alaska**: Calkin shares her intriguing journey to Alaska, where she and her family built a life, highlighting her hands-on approach and the significance of community and environment in her writing and personal growth.

- **00:03:20 - Inspiration behind *The Soul of My Soldier***: Calkin discusses the emotional triggers and inspirations for writing her book, rooted in her experiences and observations as a military spouse, particularly during her husband's deployment to Desert Storm.

- **00:06:30 - A Reading from *The Soul of My Soldier***: Abigail reads a poignant excerpt from her book, conveying the profound emotional and psychological scars left by war, not only on the soldiers but also on their families.

- **00:09:17 - Understanding Veterans and PTSD**: Calkin provides insight into living with and supporting veterans with PTSD. She emphasizes patience, understanding, and the importance of communication, sharing personal anecdotes to illuminate the challenges and strategies for coping.

- **00:11:28 - Audience Engagement and Reception**: Robbins and Calkin discuss the diverse reactions to *The Soul of My Soldier* from military and civilian readers alike, highlighting the book's impact and the varied perspectives on military service and its aftermath.

- **00:16:22 - Honoring and Supporting Veterans**: Calkin articulates thoughtful and meaningful ways to honor, support, and understand veterans. She reflects on both personal gestures and broader societal acknowledgments that contribute to recognizing and appreciating veterans' sacrifices.

- **00:20:25 - Closing Remarks and Contact Information**: The episode concludes with Robbins thanking Calkin for her insights and contributions. Calkin shares her contact information, inviting listeners to explore her work further.

Key Takeaways

- The emotional and psychological challenges faced by military families, particularly those dealing with PTSD, require patience, understanding, and open communication.

- Writing and poetry can serve as powerful therapeutic tools for expressing and coping with the complexities of military life and its impacts on soldiers and their families.

- Honoring and supporting veterans involves both personal gestures of kindness and societal efforts to recognize and appreciate their sacrifices and service.

Show Notes By Barevalue

Tweetable Quotes

- *"Understanding and supporting our veterans with PTSD requires patience, compassion, and the willingness to listen." - Abigail Calkin*

- *"Writing can be a powerful therapy for the soul, helping military families navigate the enduring impacts of service and sacrifice." - Abigail Calkin*

On today's episode of the "Helping Families Be Happy" podcast, host Christopher Robbins, co-founder of Familius Publishing, husband, father of nine, author, fisherman, backpacker, and aspirational musician based in the Central Valley of California, talks to author and illustrator Liz Swenson. Liz has written two survival guides for parents: "You Got This, Mama: From boobs to Blowouts, a Survival Guide for New Mothers" and "Raising Tiny Humans: From Potty Training to Prejudice, The Survival Guide for the Wild Toddler Years." The discussion focuses on raising toddlers and includes valuable insights into teaching children about dehumanizing language, separating behavior from the person, and fostering executive function skills.

Episode Highlights:

• 01:30: Christopher extends Valentine's Day wishes and delves into the evolution of Liz's books, "You Got This, Mama" and "Raising Tiny Humans," laying the foundation for the discussion.
• 03:04: The focus shifts to a critical aspect of parenting toddlers: teaching them about dehumanizing language and its subtle yet impactful nuances.
• 05:07: Liz emphasizes the significance of distinguishing between a child's behavior and their core identity, encouraging a healthy understanding of hurtful actions.
• 06:29: Exploring the concept of "hurt people hurting people," Liz sheds light on how understanding this dynamic can help address negative behaviors in toddlers.
• 08:00: The conversation turns to the development of executive function skills in toddlers, with Liz underlining the importance of explicit teaching in this area.
• 09:49: Liz discusses the necessity for parents to undergo mental shifts, specifically reframing tantrums as expressions of significant emotions rather than mere misbehavior.
• 11:42: The podcast delves into the crucial topic of prioritizing parental well-being and self-care, acknowledging the challenges of navigating parenthood.
• 13:50: Liz shares valuable insights gained from her journey of writing books and raising toddlers, offering a glimpse into the lessons learned along the way.
• 16:51: Liz share practical tips for "levelling up" parenting emerge, emphasizing the importance of taking intentional breaks and being mindful of language choices.

Key Points:

1. The conversation highlights the importance of nurturing executive function skills in toddlers through explicit teaching, breaking down tasks, and promoting resilience, contributing to overall cognitive and emotional development.
2. Recognizing the challenges of parenting, the discussion underscores the significance of parents prioritizing their well-being, taking intentional breaks, and practicing patience to create a supportive environment for both them and their toddlers.
3. By reframing tantrums as expressions of significant emotions rather than mere misbehavior, parents can navigate challenges with patience and empathy.

Tweetable Quotes:

• "Teaching toddlers isn't just about ABCs; it's about nurturing their executive function skills, breaking tasks into steps, and fostering resilience." - Liz Swenson
• "Parenting is a journey of self-discovery. Prioritize your well-being, take breaks, and grow alongside your child for a more fulfilling experience." - Christopher Robbins
• "Words matter. Reframing language to separate behavior from identity helps create a positive environment where toddlers learn empathy and understanding." - Liz Swenson

Resources Mentioned

• Helping Families Be Happy Podcast Apple
• https://lizswenson.org/
• Podcast Editing

On today's episode of the "Helping Families Be Happy" podcast, host Christopher Robbins, co-founder of Familius Publishing, husband, father of nine, author, fisherman, backpacker, and aspirational musician based in the Central Valley of California, talks to Caroline Saunders, a Bleu-trained freelance food writer and recipe developer. Caroline is known for her work in climate-friendly cuisine, discusses sustainability practices that start at the end of the fork, emphasizing the importance of making eco-conscious choices in daily life. The discussion focuses on exploring sustainability in the kitchen and how individuals can become better stewards of the planet through their food choices.

Episode Highlights:

• 01:51: Caroline discusses the significant role of food in the global climate crisis, emphasizing that the food system contributes to about one-third of global carbon emissions annually.
• 02:39: Caroline talks about food waste and its impact on the environment, mentioning that food waste drives about 80% of global carbon emissions. She provides insights into the challenges of food waste and how individuals can address it.
• 04:20: The conversation shifts to practical tips for reducing food waste. Caroline introduces strategies like the "first in, first out" method and befriending the freezer to minimize waste.
• 05:44: Caroline addresses the issue of food waste, pointing out that 80% of global carbon emissions come from food waste. She provides practical tips, like the "first in, first out" method, to reduce food waste at the household level.
• 09:48: Christopher addresses the issue of increasing meat consumption and its implications and asks Caroline about practical steps and considerations for reducing animal product intake.
• 10:08: The focus turns to the environmental impact of consuming animal products. Caroline emphasizes the importance of making more sustainable choices, such as opting for chicken over red meat, eggs over chicken, and so on.
• 11:42: Caroline highlights the connection between biodiversity, health, and longevity. She mentions the "Blue Zones" concept, where regions with centenarians share commonalities like plant-forward diets.
• 12:08: Christopher shifts the conversation towards healthier eating and asks Caroline for guidance on starting a journey towards a more sustainable and healthy diet.
• 14:30: Caroline introduces the concept of climate-friendly desserts. She explains her passion for sustainable dessert recipes, emphasizing plant-forward desserts and using leftovers creatively for desserts.
• 17:32: Caroline delves into the role of dessert in sustainability, discussing plant-forward desserts and the versatility of desserts in utilizing leftover ingredients.

Key Points:

1. Food contributes significantly to global carbon emissions, prompting the need for sustainable eating practices.
2. Reducing food waste and shifting towards plant-based diets are pivotal in combating climate change.
3. Lowering meat consumption, especially red meat, is essential for both personal health and environmental sustainability.

Tweetable Quotes:

• "Health and sustainability go hand in hand. A plant-forward diet not only benefits us but also nurtures the biodiversity crucial for a resilient food system." - Caroline
• "Every meal is an opportunity to make a positive impact on our planet. Small changes in our food choices today lead to a healthier and more sustainable future tomorrow." - Christopher
• "Desserts aren't just sweet treats; they're solutions. Embrace climate-friendly ingredients and turn leftovers into a delightful part of your sustainability journey." - Caroline

Resources Mentioned

• Helping Families Be Happy Podcast Apple
• https://www.caroline-saunders.com/
• https://palebluetart.substack.com/
• Podcast Editing

On today's episode of the "Helping Families Be Happy" podcast, host Christopher Robbins, co-founder of Familius Publishing, husband, father of nine, author, fisherman, backpacker, and aspirational musician based in the Central Valley of California, talks to Kathryn Thompson. Kathryn is a web designer and consultant for small businesses and non-profits, with a passion for knitting and a penchant for Taylor Swift songs. Kathryn is also the author of three books: "Drops of Awesome," "Buckets of Awesome," and "532 Ways to Be Awesome." The focus of today's episode is on the significance of laughter and play in family dynamics.

Episode Highlights:

• 02:00: Kathryn shares the origin of the awesome concept during a challenging period of postpartum depression. She explains how the concept emerged as a way to shift her perspective and find humor in difficult situations.
• 03:16: Kathryn discusses the visualization of "drops of awesome" and how it became a tool for building momentum in her daily life. The metaphorical bucket of awesome is introduced as a way to celebrate small victories.
• 04:52: Kathryn shares her experience with overcoming the negative voice in her head and how the concept of drops of awesome helped her focus on the positive aspects of her life. The discussion touches on the motivation that comes from celebrating small victories.
• 05:16: Positive reader feedback is highlighted, with Kathryn sharing a specific story of a reader who found inspiration and permission to recognize their own drops of awesome. The transformative effect of the concept on people's lives is discussed.
• 07:03: Christopher discusses challenges in Kathryn's life, such as postpartum depression, her husband's layoff, and health issues. He prompts Kathryn to share stories illustrating how humor and laughter helped during these difficult times.
• 08:01: Reflecting on the job loss, Kathryn stresses the importance of finding ways to connect and solidify family relationships through humor. She shares how they turned a challenging situation into a memorable play day.
• 10:12: Kathryn recalls the laughter and joy she and her husband experienced while creating the humorous LinkedIn profile. She shares the positive outcome of the job search, emphasizing that their attitude and approach shifted the entire tone of the experience.
• 11:43: Christopher addresses how humor can be used to emotionally strengthen during serious health issues, referring to Kathryn's experience with her daughter's thyroid cancer diagnosis.
• 13:20: Kathryn details their humorous approach to her daughter's surgery, including a knitted stocking for the thyroid and a playful sword to "fight" cancer. The family continued finding humor in the post-surgery period, creating jokes around the scar and even displaying a stuffed thyroid in a jar.
• 14:38: Kathryn emphasizes that their humor was never at the expense of her daughter, Claire, and it always followed Claire's lead and sense of humor. The family's approach helped them find joy during challenging times.
• 15:36: Kathryn advises not to take oneself too seriously during challenging times. She suggests stopping and asking, "What is funny about this situation?" as a way to shift perspective and find humor even in the darkest moments.

Key Points:

1. Kathryn introduces the "drops of awesome" concept as a coping mechanism during postpartum depression, celebrating small positive actions to shift perspective.
2. The conversation explores using humor and play during challenging times, including a layoff turned into a playful family day and finding humor in a daughter's thyroid cancer journey.
3. Kathryn advises to ask, "What is funny about this situation?" as a practical way to use humor during tough times, emphasizing the importance of not taking oneself too seriously.

Tweetable Quotes:

• "In the midst of challenges, celebrate the small victories as drops of awesome to shift your perspective and build momentum." - Christopher
• "Humor is a powerful tool to navigate adversity; finding light in dark situations strengthens family bonds and fosters resilience." - Kathryn
• "Amidst life's challenges, let humor be your ally. Laughter not only lightens the load but strengthens bonds, making even the darkest moments brighter." - Kathryn

Resources Mentioned:

• Helping Families Be Happy Podcast Apple
• https://kathrynthompson.net/
• https://dropsofawesome.com/
• Podcast Editing

In this insightful episode of "Helping Families Be Happy," host Christopher Robbins engages with Christopher Mannino, a former theater teacher turned author, to explore how the principles of play and theater can significantly enhance parent-child relationships. The discussion delves into practical techniques and personal anecdotes that highlight the transformative power of play, offering listeners a blend of theory, actionable advice, and inspiring examples to foster deeper connections within their families.

Episode Highlights:

• 00:00:09: Christopher Robbins introduces the "Helping Families Be Happy" podcast, setting the stage for a dialogue on using play to strengthen parent-child relationships. Robbins, a father of nine with a diverse background, shares his passion for bringing real-life, nurturing information about love, family, relationships, and life to listeners.
• 00:01:39: Guest Christopher Mannino expresses gratitude for being part of the podcast and sets the tone for a conversation focused on the art of playful interaction and its role in family dynamics.
• 00:01:43: The concept of transforming parent-child relationships through play is introduced. Mannino provides context by reflecting on his experiences as a theater teacher and a stay-at-home dad, emphasizing the natural yet overlooked importance of play in building strong familial bonds.
• 00:02:54: Mannino advocates for dedicated playtime, suggesting a minimum of ten minutes daily to deeply engage with children. He shares how meaningful these moments can become, transforming ordinary play into cherished memories that bolster the child-parent connection.
• 00:04:11: The conversation shifts to specific theater techniques that can enhance play, with Mannino offering practical advice on engaging children and entering their imaginative worlds through the principle of "Yes, and."
• 00:07:34: Another theater technique, emotional recall or using an "anchor," is discussed. Mannino explains how drawing on vivid, positive memories can help parents become more present and emotionally available during playtime.
• 00:11:46: Strategies for changing negative dynamics, especially after a child has had a tough day, are explored. The significance of maintaining a playful and affirmative approach to diffuse tension and shift the mood is highlighted.
• 00:14:35: The conversation concludes with insights into Mannino's upcoming book, which aims to provide parents with tools to revolutionize their playtime interactions and deepen familial relationships through simple yet effective theater-inspired methods.
• 00:17:01: Robbins wraps up the discussion by thanking Mannino for his insights and asking about ways listeners can connect with him online, leading to the sharing of Mannino's contact information.

Key Takeaways: 1. Daily, dedicated playtime can significantly enhance the parent-child connection, turning routine interactions into lasting memories. 2. The use of theater techniques like "Yes, and" and emotional recall can deeply enrich play experiences, fostering creativity, acceptance, and emotional bonding. 3. Addressing negative moods and dynamics through playful engagement, rather than confrontation, can effectively transform challenging moments into opportunities for connection and joy. 4. Introducing structured yet flexible play exercises from theater can provide parents with powerful tools to engage and connect with their children on a deeper level.

Tweetable Quotes:

• "The more you play with your kids, the richer the memories and the stronger the bond." - Christopher Mannino
• "Saying 'Yes, and' to your child's imaginative ideas can open up a world of creativity and connection." - Christopher Mannino
• "Using positive emotional anchors can help us be more present and engaged during playtime with our kids." - Christopher Mannino

Resources Mentioned: Christopher Mannino: https://www.christophermannino.com/