I've been thinking a lot about what to bring you for this last episode of 2023, and what felt most honest was a tiny reflection of my own and an invitation for you to consider your waiting as well.

As I reflect on the past year, specifically the past five episodes of this season, I realize that there seems to be an underlying tone of waiting in every conversation around shame. Waiting while grieving, learning to stay while we work on believing new stories about ourselves, being patient as we learn and change, knowing to wait for our voice to be heard, and learning to redirect judgment while remaining.

So here are some personal thoughts from my own place of navigating shame and the current waiting I find myself in. As we go into a new year, I can foresee many exciting and challenging changes, for now, I am just learning to wait.

“I come to the work of living and leading relationally with the lived experience of moving through life in the U.S. as an autistic, multi-racial and sometimes white-presenting “other” with many other intersecting privileges and marginalized identities. I bring relentless compassion, an unusual perspective, and an eclectic variety of tools to the conversation of expanding our lives and our leadership beyond personal growth and into relational development.”

I think it speaks for itself on why I was so excited to extend the invite to share this space with James oliva and why I am so grateful to share no be able to share this conversation with you. As we move into this holiday season and a new year I cant think of anything we need more than relentless compassion.

When it comes to this ongoing conversation on the impacts of shame James-olivia provides a really powerful perspective on the inter-workings of judgment and some alternative questions to consider. ⁠Learn more here

Have you ever questioned if your story, your voice, your experience really matters in this world?

Desirée shares so openly as a reminder that every voice has power, and purpose, and though finding that isn’t easy, it is so important. This episode is an invitation to hear the story of an incredible musician who is learning how to use their voice through the music and continue when the music is turned down.

Desirée said it so well, this is a conversation for those who are looking to hold more compassionate space for one another and self. I really can not think of anything our world needs more of right now.

Check out more of Desirée story & additional resources here..

This episode is really just the beginning of a much-needed and very refreshing perspective from Nicole Caudana on how the conversation around sustainability in our world needs to begin shifting.

As The Giving Gifts and Mindful Metals Studio (Nicole's incredible small business) merge together, this is actually a conversation Nicole and I are having, and together, we decided it would be really fun to invite you into this conversation with us.

If there are any changes worth making in this world, shouldn't those changes be worth sustaining?

This is a question that I have spent years considering when it comes to integrating mental health and trauma-informed care tools and resources into the lives of individuals and communities globally and a question Nicole has become an expert on in the world of ocean conservation, entrepreneurship, and teaching.

It took shifting the shame that comes with not having it all figured out to get us to a place of being open to learning from and with one another, a gift that we are so very eager and excited to share with you.

You can learn more about Nicole, Mindful Metals Studio, and what she is up to with The Giving Gifts here.

Jaimie, is an incredibly humble and thoughtful leader, mom, wife, friend, and the founder of Grind House in the sweet community of Encinitas. When I met Jaimie for the first time, it was in passing at a farmers market and there was something about the posture of curiosity she had in a few-minute conversation that made me very curious of her story. This was actually my first time hearing her story and I am seriously so thankful for her candid honesty. There is something in this episode for everyone.

I knew the conversation with Jaimie was going to be a great one when within the first ten minutes we were already talking about peeling back ego and judgment.

I hope that this episode sheds a little light on a topic that holds quite a lot for many people. As a good friend of mine texted me just this last week “Shame can only live where it is hidden, so by exposing things that bring shame up through conversation, we start to eliminate it.”

When I made the list of individuals I wanted to have on this season, Mary was the first name I wrote…next to her name, I put question marks, telling myself that she wouldn't be interested in sharing on this podcast…I have never been more grateful to be totally wrong!

This episode explores the theme of suffering significant loss. "I live in happy, sad daily…every day I live in sad happy. There is not a day really that I can say is completely happy anymore, but I can also say, there is not a completely sad day." Mary shares life after losing a son, a husband, and, most recently, a daughter this past May.

Mary's story is a reminder of the reality that everyone goes through losing someone; some people lose more than others. It doesn't always make sense, it's definitely not always fair, and it is most certainly important to create space to talk about.

When you let people walk alongside you through life, you invite others into the suffering you experience, and that's beautiful and hard and something I so admire the way Mary continues to do.

At the end of season three, I truly did not know if there would be another season of this podcast. Not because I don’t LOVE what this podcast space has created, but mostly because I was asking if putting more noise in an already very loud world was really needed right now.

Over the last three months, in the midst of a lot of my own grieving, I’ve spent a lot of time listening. Listening to friends and family, listening to the community I live in, listening to the global communities I stay connected to, listening (selectively) to the news and media and podcasts and books, listening to myself. A LOT of listening, and here’s what I have come to…

Our world needs more space to explore and share in one another’s suffering openly…

This season of the podcast is called “Shame Shift”, shifting the conversations from suffering from shame to possibility. Possibility to connect, possibility to explore aspects of yourself and others, possibility to shift the way we listen and respond! The same vision for real people to share real stories as they navigate using their gifts in this world with a few added components!

Welcome to the giving gifts podcast…a place for real people to share real stories and if I'm being really honest with you this has been such a challenging episode to put together. Over a month ago I was brainstorming how to conclude this season of the giving gifts podcast and I had the thought of a collaborative episode. I wanted to give everyone who shared on the season an opportunity just to share what they are learning right now and a little encouragement.

Honestly, this idea came from a place of being a bit discouraged. I love getting to create space for people to share, and sometimes it feels like I am trying to create something in a world that feels so full..like no one has the time or space to slow down to care. So when this idea came up to make this last episode a collaborative piece, all I had in mind was that it really is such a gift to have a space to host the words and stories of individuals all over this world, and even if one person is impacted…its worth it

What I didn’t know at that time is that one person who needed to hear and receive all those words at that moment was actually me.

I definitely did not realize that this episode would be host to some of the last words my very special friend, Karimy Jutila, would share here on earth.

I have held on to this episode's words for over three weeks. Wanting so desperately to make something beautiful enough to reflect the impact, love, and care I have for Karimy and all of the brave people to share throughout this season.

What I am learning right now is that the impact we have on one another is not contingent on how successful you become, or how put together your life appears to be, and it does not wait for things to go the way you imagined they might. Impact happens when we see one another, in suffering, in celebration, in life, and in death. And my encouragement is to really listen to the voices in this episode, and let them be a reminder of just how fragile life is and how impact is a gift we all have to give. May stories like Karimys be a reminder that your story is so incredibly important and needed in this world.