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Hey folks, Jack Burton here. I’m just talkin’ to whoever is listenin’ out there. Some crazy shenanigans are afoot in Chinatown. Green eyed girls are being kidnapped. Who’s to blame? Gangs of martial artists, storms in human form, supernatural beings, magic, and even Krang himself is involved! Will our friends make it through all the fights and the weird buildings that seem to hold water without explanation? Hop on the Pork-Chop Express and take a ride with us as we discuss Big Trouble In Little China!

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It’s been a while since we’ve been on dick patrol, but rest assured, we are in this one. Boody traps? Booby traps! Ranking Corey Feldman’s work. Ranking Raphael as a ninja turtle. Beta Max? Rare and under-appreciated ice cream flavors. Putting bros in their place. Alice In Chains done acapella. Oh, and LOTS of actual Goonies stuff that didn’t fit in the main episode. We offer variety, just like Swensen’s! COME.

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Ok everyone, repeat after me… “I will never betray my Goon Dock friends. We will stick together until the whole world ends. Through heaven, and hell, and nuclear war. Good pals like us, will stick like tar. In the city, or the country, or the forest, or the boonies. I am proudly declared one of the Goonies!” We don’t need to convince you to listen to this one, because it’s a massive episode. Grab a Baby Ruth, or some Rocky…Road? And join us as we discuss the legendary classic; The Goonies!

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Hey, Judgy Judgerson! Are you folks bummed when we burp on the mics? There is something seriously wrong with getting picked up at the airport, and then having to drive home. Shonash Ravine. Separating the art and the artist. Smoking that pot in the back of McDonald’s. Don’t even get Shrout started on the Dr Pepper / Pibb Xtra discussion. Kid free is the way to be! The ultimate psych out. It’s all here! Just go in!

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Howdy partners! Let me go ahead and tell y’all a little tale about three guys that are your typical rich assholes that have good lives… well, not one of them, he found himself in a little trouble with the Mrs., if ya know what I mean. But anyways, theys done decided to go on a little cattle drive to make themselves feel better or somethin’… you know, the type of shit rich assholes do when theys get bored. So, theys meet a bunch of real men and learn a little bit about themselves. Will theys find happiness out there on the ol’ trail? There’s only one way to find out! Join us as we discuss City Slickers! YEEE HAAWWW!

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This one is all over the place. YEAH. Lots of music talk. Heavy TVs. Brown sugar. Whiskey roulette. Omaha. Semen retention. Rancid. YEAH. Jason gets confused. Shrout is a gatekeeper. Are Andy’s dogs lighting fireworks upstairs? Are they unloading the dishwasher? Whoa. Heaven let your light shine down.

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Hello friends. Nice of you to join us. In this movie, a high school student moves to a town that is located on an island, and befriends a long-haired guy, Powder, and a thoroughly sultry girl (who, in any real high school, would be one of the most popular girls). I apologize. Back to the task at hand. This student falls in with the wrong crowd, and even though the best students in school, the Blue Ribbons, try and bring him onto the good side, he ruins everything by befriending a stuttering old codger in the basement, and complete chaos ensues. Make sure you save all of your fluids, and join us as we discuss Disturbing Behavior!

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Welcome to pronunciation station with TMRP! The Problem Child franchise. Colon blow. Barking spiders. Cantaloupe in a courtroom. Sweat pants. Breakaway pants. Gym clothes. Scooter kids with stupid dorky mohawks on their helmets. Rollerblading? Yes, rollerblading. LOL.

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