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What do you do with the story of your abuse?

Who do you tell? What do you tell them?

You will find yourself in many different situations with many different people where you will need to share the same story of your narcissistic abuse over and over again and it is actually important to make a conscious decision on how and what you are sharing with the different people.

Today we are going to talk about discernment, specifically about sharing your story. But the strategies here can generalize to many other areas where you need to make conscious and intentional decisions.

Early on in your healing…

You likely look like a hot mess, you are learning the language, learning the systems, it is likely that you do not fully understand what you are in for with post separation abuse and the family court system…

You probably show up in one of two ways,

Word vomit/fire hydrant of info… context for days, looking like a crazy person
Shut down, not trusting, fearful

Both make sense.

Now that you have some psycho ed under your belt and hopefully have done some healing work with a therapist or in a group…

Use these questions to assess who and what you will share about your abuse story?

What is the role of the person you are talking to?
What is the goal you hope to achieve?
What evidence do you have that this person will listen/understand?
Where are you in this moment?
How safe will the information be?

Once you have asked these questions, then you can make decisions and some discernment about how much and what to share.

And if you have the calling to do advocacy work, write a book, or speak in public about your story, there are some other considerations you need to consider.

Episode References:

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The Journey Back to You: Rewriting Your Story is a Transformative Retreat for Survivors of Relationship Abuse.

Join us for a transformative two-day, in-person retreat designed to help you rewrite your story. This retreat is a refuge where you can connect with others who understand your journey and take steps toward reclaiming your narrative.

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If you want to chat more about this topic I would love to continue our conversation over on Instagram! @risingbeyondpc

If you want to support the show you may do so here at, Buy Me A Coffee. Thank you! We love being able to make this information accessible to you and your community.

If you've been looking for a supportive community of women going through the topics we cover, head over to our website to learn more about the Rising Beyond Community. - https://www.risingbeyondpc.com/

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If you share more than one child with your narcissistic ex, then it is likely that you have seen your children treated differently.

Oftentimes a narcissistic parent creates a dynamic where one child is “the golden child” and another is “the scapegoat.” The golden child is treated much differently than the other children, getting more attention and special treatment, whereas a scapegoated child will take the brunt of the blame and shame for anything that is going wrong or that the narcissistic parent doesn’t like.

But why does this dynamic persist and why is it so common?

And more importantly, what can you do as a protective parent to help your children as they manage the negative consequences of this dynamic?

In this episode we take a look at why this dynamic works for a narcissistic parent, the negative consequences for each child, and what you can do about it as a protective parent.

Please leave us a review! Reviews help the show get out to more people.

If you want to chat more about this topic I would love to continue our conversation over on Instagram! @risingbeyondpc

If you want to support the show you may do so here at, Buy Me A Coffee. Thank you! We love being able to make this information accessible to you and your community.

If you've been looking for a supportive community of women going through the topics we cover, head over to our website to learn more about the Rising Beyond Community. - https://www.risingbeyondpc.com/

Where to find more from Rising Beyond:
Rising Beyond Facebook
Rising Beyond LinkedIn
Rising Beyond Pinterest

Enjoy some of our freebies!

• Canned Responses Freebie
• Mic Drop Moments Freebie
• Our FREE Download a Roadmap to Communicating with your Narcissistic Ex
• Free Mini Guide to Decrease Your Child's Anxiety Around Visits

Register for the Septe...

Send us a Text Message.

Did you know that there are actually members of law enforcement that understand and want to find solutions to support victims of domestic violence and coercive control?

I know for many of you this is hard to believe, and I have found one!

In today’s episode of The Rising Beyond Podcast I interview Detective Brandon Wootan on his journey starting a high risk domestic violence team, what it looks like and the goals of the team. We also take a look at the risk factors correlated with domestic violence homicide, where law enforcement is missing the mark, and some tips and strategies for victims and survivors when reaching out to law enforcement to help.

I learned a lot from this episode and I feel a sense of hope with each conversation I have with Detective Wootan.

Detective Brandon Wootan's Bio:
As a police detective with over a decade of law enforcement experience, I am committed to protecting and serving the community with integrity, professionalism, and compassion. My core competencies include investigation management, teaching, teamwork and leadership.

Currently, I work as a detective at the City of Fort Collins, where I investigate crimes against persons, such as homicide, assault, sexual assault, and domestic violence. I also lead the Larimer County Domestic Violence High Risk Team, a multidisciplinary team of professionals who collaborate to identify, assess, and intervene in high-risk domestic violence cases. Additionally, I leverage my teaching skills to provide training and education on domestic violence prevention and response to law enforcement agencies, community organizations, and the public. I have contributed to the development and implementation of policies and protocols to enhance the safety and well-being of domestic violence survivors and their families.

References mentioned:
AIMEE Says app
Talking Parents app

Please leave us a review! Reviews help the show get out to more people.

If you want to chat more about this topic I would love to continue our conversation over on Instagram! @risingbeyondpc

If you want to support the show you may do so here at, Buy Me A Coffee. Thank you! We love being able to make this information accessible to you and your community.

If you've been looking for a supportive community of women going through the topics we cover, head over to our website to learn more about the Rising Beyond Community. - https://www.risingbeyondpc.com/

Where to find more from Rising Beyond:
Rising Beyond Facebook
Rising Beyond LinkedIn
Rising Beyond Pinterest

Enjoy some of our freebies!

• Canned Responses Freebie
• Mic Drop Moments Freebie
• Our FREE Download a Roadmap to Communicating with your Narcissistic Ex
• Free Mini Guide to Decrease Your Child's Anxiety Around Visits

Register for the Septe...