Episodios

  • PREVIEW | Pieter Valk (coming September 16, 2025)
    Sep 12 2025

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    Go to whatwereallywant.show and follow us on your favorite podcast platform, to make sure you don't miss out on a single episode, including...

    There are several issues that represent potential landmines for Christians. One of them is how Christians relate to the LGBT+ community. Another is the concept of singleness vs. marriage. PIETER VALK is someone who has signed up to tackle both of these issues with conscientiously and compassionately. Pieter is the founder and executive director of EQUIP, a premier consulting and training solution for churches aspiring to be places where LGBT+ people are embraced, and thrive according to historic sexual ethics.

    In recent years, Pieter has written and spoken extensively on the topic of vocational singleness, and encourages Christians to consider this not as a curse, but as a calling on their lives.

    Episode 45 | Pieter Valk: Singleness - Curse or Calling will be available Tuesday, September 16th!

    #pietervalk #equip #equipyourcommunity #vocationalsingleness #lgbt #gaychristian #pornaddiction #sexaddiction #healing #recovery #grace #gospel #transformation


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    1 m
  • 45 | Drew Boa: How We Outgrow Porn
    Sep 2 2025

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    People addicted to pornography often experience lots of shame and self-contempt ("What's wrong with me?!"). They often see their sexual desire, and the fact that they go to porn to try and satisfy it, as THE problem.

    Our guest, DREW BOA, disagrees. In his new book Outgrow Porn: Find Lasting Freedom Without Fighting an Exhausting Battle, Drew says, "Your sexuality is not the problem, and the urge to watch porn is not bad either. It's a symptom of unprocessed pain. When you understand this, your journey will dramatically change."

    In this great conversation with our first returning guest, we talk with Drew about how compassion and curiosity are far more helpful in outgrowing porn struggles than shame, self-condemnation, and strategies limited only to behavior management. We discuss how evangelicalism's history of unhelpful messages about sex have negatively contributed to people's struggles. And we talk about how committing to a path of healing and recovery can help us find what we've been looking for all along.

    Drew is the founder of Husband Material, an online community where men can find friends, coaching, and resources to support them in their path to living as mature, healthy men.

    Some of the items we discussed in the episode:

    • Drew's previous episode of What We Really Want
    • Sheila & Keith Gregoire's episode of What We Really Want
    • Johan Hari's famous TED Talk

    How to connect with Drew:

    • Husband Material website
    • Husband Material podcast
    • Outgrow Porn book from Drew's website (discount + bonus materials)
    • Outgrow Porn book on Amazon

    #drewboa #husbandmaterial #outgrowporn #healtheboytofreetheman #purityculture #pornography #pornaddiction #sexaddiction #healing #recovery #grace #gospel #transformation #awaken #awakenrecovery #awakenpodcast #whatwereallywant #wwrw #connection #conversation


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    47 m
  • 44 | Kelly Bourque: Finding Your Way Back
    Aug 19 2025

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    When couples in conflict feel a million miles apart, are they? Are the areas of "stuckness" as insurmountable as it sometimes feels?

    KELLY BOURQUE, is a therapist who specializes in Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT), a modality of counseling that focuses on attachment science and how it shows up in romantic relationships. Kelly is the founder of Red Therapy Group in Franklin TN. EFT is a modality based in attachment theory, and is helpful in allowing couples to identify unhealthy patterns in their relationships. Patterns such as the "push/pull" or "pursuer/withdrawer" dynamic, or with anxious/avoidant attachment styles.

    Kelly talks about how EFT has been invaluable in helping couples see that despite the surface conflict, they usually desire the same things. It can help them get out of old, unhelpful cycles and find their way back to each other more healthily and authentically.

    #kellybourque #redtherapygroup #emotionallyfocusedtherapy #efttherapy #efct #efit #suejohnson #holdmetight #createdforconnection #addiction #recovery #grace #gospel #transformation

    Free consultation for 3-day intensives in Franklin, TN. Click here

    Red Therapy Group website (traditional therapy for TN residents)

    Kelly's book I Have Feelings About This

    Kelly's video series for betrayal trauma recovery

    Find an EFT therapist (https://iceeft.com/)

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    59 m
  • 43 | John Steakley: You Point to Your Limp
    Aug 5 2025

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    People walking through the wilderness of addiction can have a hard time finding places that feel truly safe to open up. Yet authentic connection is the key to freedom from addiction. One of the things that gives the safety people seek is a person who chooses to be open about their own "limp," not hiding from their personal failures.

    John Steakley is that kind of person. Since walking through his own addictive struggle with alcohol, John has been using that experience to help hundreds of others find hope as they seek to walk out of that same wilderness. John is the founder and Executive Director of Unbound Grace Ministries, a support & counseling ministry helping people who have found themselves trapped in unhealthy relationships with alcohol and other substances.

    John talks about the importance of providing safe healing space by how we are vulnerable with our own struggles (pointing to our limp). Pointing to our own limp also helps us and others remember that it's not about us or what we can do... our limp also points to God, the "Power greater than ourselves," who desires to restore us to the lives we were meant to live.

    John has written a book, also titled Unbound Grace. He lives in Birmingham AL with his family.

    #johnsteakley #unboundgrace #addiction #recovery #grace #gospel #transformation #healing #gospel #grace #awaken #awakenrecovery #awakenpodcast #whatwereallywant #wwrw #connection #conversation

    Unbound Grace ministry website

    Unbound Grace book (on Amazon)


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    49 m
  • 42 | Bob Flayhart: Living the Gospel Waltz
    Jul 22 2025

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    For people in the Birmingham AL area, or who are part of the PCA denomination, BOB FLAYHART is probably a name you've heard. In 1989 Bob was the founding pastor of Oak Mountain Presbyterian Church, and served as lead pastor there until 2024. Bob has remained a consistent advocate for the pure message of God's unconditional love, grace, and transforming power through the gospel.

    Both Greg and Bobby benefitted from Bob's (and OMPC's) openness to provide a welcoming space for recovering people to meet for support. In our conversation we talk about how obvious it is that pastors should be open to supporting people in recovery, and why for some ministry leaders it doesn't seem so obvious.

    We also talk about a concept he's been preaching for years, called "The Gospel Waltz," and how understanding it can help Christian believers who struggle to recover from addiction.

    #bobflayhart #gospelwaltz #grace #gospel #transformation #oakmountainpresbyterianchurch #ompc #healing #gospel #grace #awaken #awakenrecovery #awakenpodcast #whatwereallywant #wwrw #recovery #connection #conversation

    The Gospel Waltz book (on Amazon)


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    59 m
  • A Little Extra Helping with Corinne Vance, Greg, and Stacey (Bonus Episode)
    Jul 15 2025

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    When Stacey and I talked with Corinne Vance for Episode 41, we started recording early and the conversation got really interesting really quickly (at least for us). We got to know a lot about Corinne: how she came to faith, her early experiences with Christianity, and how that has impacted her as a therapist.

    We thought you might enjoy a little extra helping of our talk with Corinne, so here it is! Please keep listening in...we'll be giving you new conversations every other Tuesday. Also, please support us by writing a positive review and giving us 5 stars where you get your podcasts.

    #corinnevance #traumatherapy #sexualtrauma #sexualabuse #therapy #spiritualhealing #counseling #healing #gospel #grace #awaken #awakenrecovery #awakenpodcast #whatwereallywant #wwrw #recovery #connection #conversation

    Corinne's counseling website

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    15 m
  • 41 | Corinne Vance: Putting the Pieces Together
    Jul 8 2025

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    There are certain experiences that are excruciatingly hard to talk about, and from which healing is incredibly difficult. Sexual abuse is far more common than most people realize, yet survivors often feel isolated and carry shame over their abuse. They need kind, caring people to support their healing.

    Corinne Vance is that kind of person. She has worked therapeutically with men, women, and adolescents for over 20 years. She has provided training and consultation (globally and in the U.S.) in the areas of aftercare for survivors of sex trafficking and domestic violence. She recently served as Director of Trauma Therapy at The WellHouse, a safe haven for victims of human trafficking in Alabama, and continues to provide clinical supervision for staff there.

    Corinne describes sexual trauma as something "that affects every family." In our conversation we unpack some of the intricacies of sexual trauma & abuse, talk about its impact on all relationships, and discuss how wrestling with God is a good thing.

    #corinnevance #traumatherapy #sexualtrauma #sexualabuse #therapy #spiritualhealing #counseling #healing #gospel #grace #awaken #awakenrecovery #awakenpodcast #whatwereallywant #wwrw #recovery #connection #conversation

    Corinne's counseling website


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    47 m
  • 40 | Harrison Scott Key: Do You Want to Be Married to Me?
    Jun 24 2025

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    What do you do when your spouse tells you she wants a divorce and is in love with another man?

    That was a question Harrison Scott Key never thought he'd have to answer. But it's exactly what happened. Over the course of several years he navigated an excruciating saga of fighting for his marriage and for his sanity. He tells the story in his New York Times bestselling book How to Stay Married: The Most Insane Love Story Ever Told.

    In our conversation with Harrison, we talked about what it was like living it, writing about it, and the unexpected impact of book tour promotion about such a personal experience. We talked about family healing, and how his friends and his church helped him find the capacity for forgiveness.

    It's a rare talent who can take such a heartbreaking story and also make it so funny; but that's exactly what Harrison does - in the book and in our conversation. Harrison is a professor at Savannah College of Art & Design, has written three books, and lives in Savannah with his wife Lauren and their kids. (He's also the drummer in a cover band called The Love Handles.)

    #harrisonscottkey #howtostaymarried #marriage #infidelity #reconciliation #spiritualhealing #counseling #therapy #gospel #grace #awaken #awakenrecovery #awakenpodcast #whatwereallywant #wwrw #recovery #connection #conversation

    Harrison's website

    Harrison's books on Amazon

    Harrison's TEDx Savannah talk on YouTube

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    59 m