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How do we stay grounded when the world feels like it’s spinning out of control? In this powerful and heartfelt episode of The Mindfully Gay Podcast, John Cottrell and Jerry Buie explore what it means to live — and thrive — as queer people during times of global unrest, political turmoil, and collective anxiety.

Recorded in the shadow of what Jerry calls “the reign of terror,” this honest conversation moves from the therapy room to the yoga mat, from personal stories to historical reflection. John and Jerry connect today’s fears to major cultural turning points — 9/11, the AIDS crisis, marriage equality, and beyond — revealing how the LGBTQ+ community has always found resilience in connection, creativity, and self-understanding.

They remind listeners that true power doesn’t come from external validation — not from politics, religion, or social approval — but from the deep spiritual knowing of who we already are. Through stories of activism, self-care, and queer wisdom, they invite us to rebuild our sense of belonging through presence, purpose, and love.

Whether you’re a therapist, activist, yogi, or simply a human seeking hope, this episode offers grounded tools for emotional resilience and a meaningful reminder:
“We cannot be erased — not by fear, not by politics, not by silence.”

Episode Highlights
•Processing collective trauma in therapy and queer life after 9/11, Pulse, and the 2024 election.
•How generational differences shape our reactions to fear and political change.
•The danger of digital activism replacing real community.
•Reclaiming spiritual authority and rejecting the need for external permission to exist.
•The importance of queer history, mentorship, and intergenerational connection.
•Redefining activism: showing up in community, teaching yoga, mentoring, or simply holding space.
•How ritual, mindfulness, and nature help us transform fear into power.

🎧 Listen to “Finding Grounded Strength in Uncertain Times” on Spotify and Apple Podcasts.
📺 Watch the full video episode on YouTube — search “Mindfully Gay Podcast.”
💬 Join the conversation on Instagram: @Mindfully_Gay
🌐 Visit MindfullyGay.com for upcoming free social events and community gatherings.

@mindfully_gay (Instagram)

Send us a text

How do we stay grounded when the world feels like it’s spinning out of control? In this powerful and heartfelt episode of The Mindfully Gay Podcast, John Cottrell and Jerry Buie explore what it means to live — and thrive — as queer people during times of global unrest, political turmoil, and collective anxiety.

Recorded in the shadow of what Jerry calls “the reign of terror,” this honest conversation moves from the therapy room to the yoga mat, from personal stories to historical reflection. John and Jerry connect today’s fears to major cultural turning points — 9/11, the AIDS crisis, marriage equality, and beyond — revealing how the LGBTQ+ community has always found resilience in connection, creativity, and self-understanding.

@mindfully_gay (Instagram)

Send us a text

What happens when we stop pretending everything's fine in the bedroom--and start talking about what's really going on?

In this powerful and compassionate episode of The Mindfully Gay Podcast, hosts Jerry Buie and John Cottrell welcome Shay Doran, a UK-born men's performance coach now based in Brazil, who helps gay men overcome sexual performance anxiety, erection issues, and intimacy challenges through emotional awareness and mindset work.

Together, Jerry, John, and Shay explore how shame, fear, and cultural conditioning--especially around porn, hookup culture, and masculine ideals--can create stress that blocks sexual connection. Shay opens up about his own journey from corporate burnout to becoming a coach dedicated to helping men reclaim confidence, pleasure, and authentic intimacy.

Listeners will gain insight into:

- What really causes performance anxiety (and why it's not just "in your head")

- How stress physiology affects arousal, climax, and erection

- The role of childhood conditioning and trauma in adult sexual behavior

- How to approach partners with openness and vulnerability

- Why emotional safety and self-trust are the foundation of satisfying sex

- Practical tools like box breathing and mindfulness for calming anxiety

- The connection between erotic energy, tantra, and spiritual intimacy

This episode is an invitation to normalize conversations about sex, release shame, and approach intimacy as a holistic expression of body, mind, and spirit. Whether you've experienced performance anxiety yourself or want to support someone who has, this is a conversation every gay man should hear.

🎧 Listen on Apple Podcasts and Spotify -- search Mindfully Gay Podcast.

📺 Watch the full video episode on YouTube -- subscribe to Mindfully Gay Podcast for new releases every other Friday.

🌐 Visit [MindfullyGay.com](https://mindfullygay.com) for community events, retreats, and resources.

Get in touch with Shay:

Links:

Performance Anxiety Quiz: https://shay-doran.com/free-quiz/

Website: https://shay-doran.com/

Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@shay-doran

Exclusive Gift (Performance Anxiety Guided Meditation): https://vimeo.com/1127971151

@mindfully_gay (Instagram)

Send us a text

What happens when we stop pretending everything's fine in the bedroom--and start talking about what's really going on?

In this powerful and compassionate episode of The Mindfully Gay Podcast, hosts Jerry Buie and John Cottrell welcome Shay Doran, a UK-born men's performance coach now based in Brazil, who helps gay men overcome sexual performance anxiety, erection issues, and intimacy challenges through emotional awareness and mindset work.

@mindfully_gay (Instagram)

Send us a text

What happens when queer community building gets moved to the morning--bright, intentional, and phone-free? In this episode of The Mindfully Gay Podcast, hosts John Cottrell and Jerry Buie sit down with Landon and Kevin, creators of Morning Wood (@morningwoodparty), a daytime, sex-positive social gathering designed to foster real connection, body positivity, and inclusive community--without the noise, the post-midnight pressure, or the performative vibe.

You'll hear how a barber-chair idea became a fast-growing movement where men of all ages, bodies, and backgrounds meet, talk, flirt, and (if they choose) explore intimacy--with consent and communication at the center. We unpack how Morningwood challenges hyper-edited "Instigay" norms, why banning phones actually lowers anxiety and boosts conversation, and how trained social hosts help newcomers feel welcome from the moment they step in.

The conversation also explores:

- Body image & age inclusivity: showing real people, not perfection filters

- Social anxiety tools: intention-setting, opt-in spaces, and "choose-your-own-adventure" design

- Sexual wellness with Legacy Health (Utah AIDS Foundation): testing, PrEP/DoxyPEP education, and game nights as low-pressure entry points

- Post-pandemic reconnection: rebuilding face-to-face community with mindful structure

- Queer innovation: expanding the cultural narrative beyond nightlife to joy, safety, and belonging

If you've ever wondered where to meet quality people in a respectful, affirming environment--or how to host gatherings that balance pleasure, safety, and authenticity--this episode is your roadmap.

Listen on audio: Download on Apple Podcasts or Spotify.

Watch the video podcast on YouTube (search: Mindfully Gay Podcast).

Follow our free social events and updates: MindfullyGay.com and @mindfully_gay.

And follow Morning Wood on Instagram @morningwoodparty

@mindfully_gay (Instagram)

Send us a text

What happens when queer community building gets moved to the morning--bright, intentional, and phone-free? In this episode of The Mindfully Gay Podcast, hosts John Cottrell and Jerry Buie sit down with Landon and Kevin, creators of Morning Wood (@morningwoodparty), a daytime, sex-positive social gathering designed to foster real connection, body positivity, and inclusive community--without the noise, the post-midnight pressure, or the performative vibe.

@mindfully_gay (Instagram)

Send us a text

What happens when we stop assuming that every instance of male touch must be sexual? In this powerful conversation, John and Jerry sit down with Travis Matthews (WLF Massage, Salt Lake City) to explore how Thai massage, fascia release, and somatic bodywork help queer men relax, refresh, and reset. We unpack why touch between men is often stigmatized, how arousal can simply be energy moving (not a sexual invitation), and practical ways to cultivate safe, affirming touch that supports healing, intimacy, and community.

You'll learn:

- Why many queer men equate touch with sex--and how to shift that paradigm

- The difference between erotic and sensual/energetic experiences

- How Thai massage & somatic work release stored tension/trauma and invite vulnerability

- Concrete practices to build touch literacy (hugs, handshakes, supportive touch) without sexual pressure

- How "Relax, Refresh, Reset" can become a daily embodiment practice

Guest:

Travis Matthews -- WLF Massage (Thai massage, fascia work, lymphatic & Swedish modalities) • Salt Lake City, UT

Website: WLFmassage.com

Key Takeaways:

- Touch can be healing, relational, and spiritual--not only sexual.

- Somatic work helps create space for new energy, clarity, and connection.

- Build community by practicing non-sexual touch in safe contexts.

- Reframe labels as conversation starters, not destinations.

Listen on audio: Apple Podcasts & Spotify

Watch more: Mindfully Gay Podcast on YouTube

Connect: MindfullyGay.com • IG: @mindfully_gay • TikTok: @MindfullyGay

Have a question or topic idea? Drop a comment or DM--we read everything.

If this helped you, like, subscribe, and share with a friend who needs it.

@mindfully_gay (Instagram)

Send us a text

What happens when we stop assuming that every instance of male touch must be sexual? In this powerful conversation, John and Jerry sit down with Travis Matthews (WLF Massage, Salt Lake City) to explore how Thai massage, fascia release, and somatic bodywork help queer men relax, refresh, and reset. We unpack why touch between men is often stigmatized, how arousal can simply be energy moving (not a sexual invitation), and practical ways to cultivate safe, affirming touch that supports healing, intimacy, and community.

@mindfully_gay (Instagram)