Polysecure

Attachment, Trauma and Consensual Nonmonogamy

By: Jessica Fern, Eve Rickert - foreword, Nora Samaran - foreword

Narrated by: Jessica Fern, Eve Rickert, Nora Samaran

Attachment theory has entered the mainstream, but most discussions focus on how we can cultivate secure monogamous relationships. What if, like many people, you’re striving for secure, happy attachments with more than one partner?

Polyamorous psychotherapist Jessica Fern breaks new ground by extending attachment theory into the realm of consensual nonmonogamy. Using her nested model of attachment and trauma, she expands our understanding of how emotional experiences can influence our relationships. Then, she sets out six specific strategies to help you move toward secure attachments in your multiple relationships. Polysecure is both a trailblazing theoretical treatise and a practical guide.

This audiobook includes a supplemental pdf.

PLEASE NOTE: When you purchase this title, the accompanying PDF will be available in your Audible Library along with the audio.

©2020 Jessica Fern (P)2025 Thornapple Press

Critic reviews

"Polysecure provides a roadmap for people who want to establish emotionally intimate and securely attached relationships with multiple partners. One of the most important insights is that secure attachment is a product of relationship experiences, rather than relationship structures."—Dr. Elisabeth Sheff, author of The Polyamorists Next Door, Stories from the Polycule, When Someone You Love is Polyamorous, and Children in Polyamorous Families

"Secure attachment is absolutely central to successful polyamorous relationships, and insecure attachment is at the core of the jealousy and other challenges in open relationships of all kinds. This book can help poly people, as well as clinicians, get to the heart of their struggles and pain. It can help them to take concrete steps to become more comfortable with their nonmonogamous relationships and trust their partner’s love and commitment. This is required reading for people in open relationships and should be used as a textbook for every therapist who works with people in polyamorous relationships."—Kathy Labriola, counselor, nurse, and author of The Polyamory Breakup Book

"Gives people a way to understand how they may be recreating old patterns by bringing their own childhood attachment styles into their adult relationships. More importantly, it offers concrete skills for how to use this knowledge to create healthier, more satisfying and secure relationship dynamics."—Max Rivers, author of Loving Conflict: How Conflict Is Really Your Relationship Trying to Go Deeper

informative in understanding the polyamourous lifestyle and how attachment influences this.

I listened to this book to deepen my understanding of polyamory in order to better serve my clients, as a therapist, that practice this lifestyle. I found a wealth of information not only on consensual non-monogamy, but on attachment that I did not expect. I feel this is a valuable resource to anyone in any type of romantic relationship.

Brilliant work on nested attachment model

Fascinating new approach on how childhood trauma impacts our adult relationship choices. Easy and insightful read.

great book for foundation work

this is a great book to start your healing journey and learn for both monogamous and non monogamous relationships

Incredible.

Highly recommend to anyone, monogamous or non-monogamous. This is a must-read for therapists and those looking to foster secure, meaningful relationships.

Learned si many things!!!

Amazing would be good for everyone to read, ENM or not. Such a blessing to have this material.