My Soon-to-Be Sex Life
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My Soon-to-Be Sex Life
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Narrated by:
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Dara Rosenberg
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By:
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Judith Tewes
About this listen
Charlie is down to her absolute. Total. Last. Resort.
Despite a thoroughly comprehensive list of potential cherry poppers, er…suitors, and careful plotting, Charlie is three weeks into her devirginization campaign, still untouched, and getting desperate. In the movie of her life, this aspiring screenwriter is giving herself a PG, for please, get some.
Her project goes into freeze frame when her mom checks herself into rehab and packs Charlie off to live with her estranged, or just plain strange, grandfather, Monty. How is she supposed to get a date when she has to go pick up his Depends? Enter Eric, a hot rehab grad on the road to redemption, and the only one who can make Charlie rethink her strategy. The more she gets to know him, the more convinced she becomes that is the one, and not just another to add to the list of people who will abandon her.
In this hilarious and heartbreaking story of one girl's detoured road to womanhood, Charlie's list develops a life of its own - right when she realizes there's so much more to lose.
©2014 Judith Tewes (P)2014 Audible Inc.Listeners also enjoyed...
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overall: irritating book
- By DD on 02-14-17
By: Tarryn Fisher
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Dark Room Etiquette
- By: Robin Roe
- Narrated by: Andrew J. Andersen
- Length: 12 hrs and 16 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 105
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 89
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 89
Sixteen-year-old Sayers Wayte has everything. Popularity, good looks, perfect grades—there's nothing Sayers' family money can't buy. Until he's kidnapped by a man who tells him the privileged life he's been living is based on a lie. Trapped in a windowless room, without knowing why he's been taken or how long the man plans to keep him shut away, Sayers faces a terrifying new reality. To survive, he must forget the world he once knew, and play the part his abductor has created for him.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Absolutely brilliant
- By Shelley on 01-20-23
By: Robin Roe
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Bleed Like Me
- By: C. Desir
- Narrated by: Brittany Pressley
- Length: 6 hrs and 34 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 35
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 33
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Story4 out of 5 stars 33
Seventeen-year-old Amelia Gannon (just "Gannon" to her friends) is invisible to almost everyone in her life. To her parents, to her teachers - even her best friend, who is more interested in bumming cigarettes than bonding. Some days the only way Gannon knows she is real is by carving bloody lines into the flesh of her stomach. Then she meets Michael Brooks, and for the first time she feels like she is being seen to the core of her being.
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5 out of 5 stars
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BY FAR MY FAVORITE BOOK EVER!
- By Unel on 01-02-17
By: C. Desir
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The Way You Make Me Feel
- By: Maurene Goo
- Narrated by: Emily Woo Zeller
- Length: 8 hrs and 4 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 56
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 51
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 49
Clara Shin lives for pranks and disruption. When she takes one joke too far, her dad sentences her to a summer working on his food truck, the KoBra, alongside her uptight classmate Rose Carver. Not the carefree summer Clara had imagined. But maybe Rose isn't so bad. Maybe the boy named Hamlet (yes, Hamlet) crushing on her is pretty cute. Maybe Clara actually feels invested in her dad's business. What if taking this summer seriously means Clara has to leave her old self behind?
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5 out of 5 stars
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The summer I stopped being “chill”
- By dataman1945 on 07-11-24
By: Maurene Goo
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The Last Breath
- By: Kimberly Belle
- Narrated by: Janet Metzger, Mary Robinette Kowal
- Length: 10 hrs and 14 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 231
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Performance4 out of 5 stars 202
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 201
Humanitarian aid worker Gia Andrews chases disasters around the globe for a living. It's the perfect lifestyle to keep her far away from her own personal ground zero. Sixteen years ago, Gia's father was imprisoned for brutally killing her stepmother. Now he's come home to die of cancer, and she's responsible for his care - and coming to terms with his guilt.
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1 out of 5 stars
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Narration is really, really bad.
- By Sandy on 07-25-19
By: Kimberly Belle
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Made You Up
- By: Francesca Zappia
- Narrated by: Amanda Ronconi
- Length: 9 hrs and 7 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 206
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 180
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 181
Reality, it turns out, is often not what you perceive it to be - sometimes, there really is someone out to get you. For fans of Silver Linings Playbook and Liar, this thought-provoking debut tells the story of Alex, a high school senior - and the ultimate unreliable narrator - unable to tell the difference between real life and delusion. Alex fights a daily battle to figure out what is real and what is not.
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1 out of 5 stars
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A DISGRACE TO AUTHORS AND MENTAL HEALTH EVERYWHERE
- By Amazon Customer on 06-27-18
By: Francesca Zappia
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Honor
- By: J.L. Drake
- Narrated by: Joe Arden, Grace Grant
- Length: 7 hrs and 19 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 403
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 374
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 377
Bullets fly during a dangerous mission, and Major Mark Lopez is critically injured. A Blackstone soldier, Mark is transferred to the North Dakota hospital, where he meets a pretty nurse, Mia. After Mark recovers from surgery, he is discharged from the hospital with orders to rest; not that he does. But when he returns to the hospital again and again with minor - and not-so-minor - injuries, Mia suspects he’s only coming to see her. When someone from Mark’s past comes to him for help, more blood is shed, and Mark must put his life on the line to keep Mia safe.
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3 out of 5 stars
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Meh...
- By RN Analyst on 03-02-19
By: J.L. Drake
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Misbehaved
- By: Charleigh Rose
- Narrated by: Ramona Master, Mark Kamish
- Length: 9 hrs
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 420
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Performance4 out of 5 stars 394
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 394
Remington Stringer has never been like most girls. She's outspoken and brazen and wants nothing more than to escape the Nevadan hell hole she calls home. On the brink of 18, with a deceased mother and a well-meaning, yet absent father, she's been forced to fend for herself. The only person she's ever been able to depend on is her borderline obsessive stepbrother. But even that anchor is quickly becoming a loose cannon. So when she gets the opportunity to attend the best private school in the state during her senior year of high school, she jumps at the chance.
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3 out of 5 stars
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Not bad but not a repeat read
- By Kaitlyn Worth on 04-28-20
By: Charleigh Rose
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Taste the Heat
- Love and Games, Book 1
- By: Rachel Harris
- Narrated by: Sophie Amoss
- Length: 7 hrs and 49 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 35
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 31
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 30
One sexy fire captain. One Cajun chef. One combustible kitchen. When chef Colby Robicheaux returned home to New Orleans to save her family restaurant, the last person she expected to reconnect with was her brother's best friend and her childhood crush. As tempting as a sugar-coated beignet, Jason is one dish she can't afford to taste. Colby can't wait to leave the place where her distrust of love and commitment originated and go back to Vegas.
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5 out of 5 stars
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This book is a delight
- By Hisani on 11-11-19
By: Rachel Harris
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Off Campus
- Bend or Break, Book 1
- By: Amy Jo Cousins
- Narrated by: Cooper North
- Length: 10 hrs and 28 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 351
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 324
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 321
With his father's Ponzi scheme assets frozen, Tom Worthington believes finishing college is impossible unless he can pay his own way. After months of sleeping in his car and gypsy cabbing for cash, he's ready to do just that. But his new older-student housing comes with an unapologetically gay roommate. Tom doesn't ask why Reese Anders has been separated from the rest of the student population. He's just happy to be sleeping in a bed.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Very powerful, sweet, good narration
- By Morgan A Skye on 10-07-16
By: Amy Jo Cousins
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Teach Me to Forget
- By: Erica M. Chapman
- Narrated by: Bailey Carr
- Length: 7 hrs and 40 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 126
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 113
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 113
Ellery wants to die. Nothing is going right. Her younger sister is dead, and her family is in a shambles. But on the day that she tries to end it all, even the gun won't work. When she tries to return it, she's intercepted by a security guard who also happens to be a boy in one of her classes, Colter Sawyer. Colter recognizes Ellery's desperation and begins working hard to earn her trust.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Darkly Romantic
- By Clayton McEwen on 01-21-17
By: Erica M. Chapman
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Carpe Demon
- By: Julie Kenner
- Narrated by: Carly Robins
- Length: 9 hrs and 56 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 93
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 82
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 82
Kate Connor is your average, everyday mom with two kids, a husband, and one very big secret...she used to be a Demon Hunter for a secret arm of the Vatican. Now retired, she's more interested in the domestic than the demonic. So when she catches sight of a demon in Walmart, she tells herself it's some other Hunter's problem. But when that demon attacks her in her kitchen, retirement is no longer an option.
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5 out of 5 stars
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I loved this book!!!
- By Anonymous User on 07-07-24
By: Julie Kenner
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Hickey
- By: Cora Brent
- Narrated by: Holly Chandler, Douglas Berger
- Length: 7 hrs and 15 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 118
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 108
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Story4 out of 5 stars 109
A long time ago, in a small town I've tried to forget...I married the charismatic all-American king of high school. He was sexy and charming. I was shy and infatuated. We were both 18. Of course we did not live happily ever after. We did the opposite. You thought that was the end? So did I. Seven years later and without warning, Branson Hickey is back in my life. Many things have changed and a few things haven't. I still want him. I still can't stand him. I still think about him all the time, even after everything we did to each other.
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4 out of 5 stars
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Second chance romance
- By AudioObsessed on 03-02-18
By: Cora Brent
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Beautiful Oblivion
- Maddox Brothers, Book 1
- By: Jamie McGuire
- Narrated by: Phoebe Strole
- Length: 8 hrs and 13 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 1,280
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 1,157
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 1,155
Trenton Maddox was the king of Eastern State University, dating co-eds before he even graduated high school. His friends wanted to be him, and women wanted to tame him, but after a tragic accident turned his world upside down, Trenton leaves campus to come to grips with the crushing guilt. Eighteen months later, Trenton is living at home with his widower father, and works full-time at a local tattoo parlor to help with the bills. Just when he thinks his life is returning to normal, he notices Cami sitting alone at a table at The Red.
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2 out of 5 stars
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Boring, Cliched, Annoying
- By Allison on 07-14-14
By: Jamie McGuire
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Fracture
- By: Megan Miranda
- Narrated by: Therese Plummer
- Length: 7 hrs and 33 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 317
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 290
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Story4 out of 5 stars 288
Eleven minutes passed before Delaney Maxwell was pulled from the icy waters of a Maine lake by her best friend, Decker Phillips. By then her heart had stopped beating. Her brain had stopped working. She was dead. And yet she somehow defied medical precedent to come back seemingly fine - despite the scans that showed significant brain damage. Everyone wants Delaney to be all right, but she knows she's far from normal. Pulled by strange sensations she can't control or explain, Delaney finds herself drawn to the dying. Is her altered brain now predicting death, or causing it?
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3 out of 5 stars
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Well Written, great narrator
- By Cndee13 on 04-29-14
By: Megan Miranda