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Ten Lessons to Transform Your Marriage
- America's Love Lab Experts Share Their Strategies for Strengthening Your Relationship
- Narrated by: Susan Denaker
- Length: 9 hrs and 15 mins
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Publisher's summary
In Ten Lessons to Transform Your Marriage, marital psychologists John and Julie Gottman provide vital tools - scientifically based and empirically verified - that you can use to regain affection and romance lost through years of ineffective communication.
In 1994, Dr. John Gottman and his colleagues at the University of Washington made a startling announcement: Through scientific observation and mathematical analysis, they could predict - with more than 90 percent accuracy - whether a marriage would succeed or fail. The only thing they did not yet know was how to turn a failing marriage into a successful one, so Gottman teamed up with his clinical psychologist wife, Dr. Julie Schwartz Gottman, to develop intervention methods. Now the Gottmans, together with the Love Lab research facility, have put these ideas into practice.
What emerged from the Gottmans’ collaboration and decades of research is a body of advice that’s based on two surprisingly simple truths: Happily married couples behave like good friends, and they handle their conflicts in gentle, positive ways.
The authors offer an intimate look at 10 couples who have learned to work through potentially destructive problems - extramarital affairs, workaholism, parenthood adjustments, serious illnesses, lack of intimacy - and examine what they’ve done to improve communication and get their marriages back on track.
Hundreds of thousands have seen their relationships improve thanks to the Gottmans’ work. Whether you want to make a strong relationship more fulfilling or rescue one that’s headed for disaster, Ten Lessons to Transform Your Marriage is essential listening.
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We are designed for relationships, yet they often bring us pain. In this paradigm-shifting book, Gary Smalley unravels the DNA of relationships: we are made for three great relationships, with God, others, and ourselves, and all relationships involve choice. Gary exposes a destructive relationship dance that characterizes nearly every relationship conflict, and he offers five new dance steps that will revolutionize relationships.
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Could be half as long
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By: Dr. Gary Smalley
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Joint Custody with a Jerk
- Raising a Child with an Uncooperative Ex
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It's a fact that parenting is hard enough in a family where two parents love and respect each other. After divorce, when the respect has diminished and the love has often turned to intense dislike, co-parenting can be nearly impossible, driving one or both parents to the brink of insanity. Joint Custody with a Jerk offers many proven communication techniques that help you deal with your difficult ex-husband or ex-wife.
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Victim blaming
- By Michelle Johann on 08-31-18
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encouragement through another chance
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The Breakup Bible
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Psychotherapist and breakup expert Rachel A. Sussman, LCSW, reveals the secrets every woman needs to get her life back on track. Drawing on hundreds of counseling sessions she's conducted with women at all stages of recovery, Sussman developed a proven three-phase process for healing from a breakup.
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lifesaver!
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Should I Stay or Should I Go?
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In this supportive and straightforward guide, Lundy Bancroft, the author of Why Does He Do That?, and communication specialist JAC Patrissi offer a way for women to practically take stock of their relationships and move forward, with or without their partners.
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Paradigm Shift
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More than a million couples can't be wrong! And with this updated edition of their award-winning book, Drs. Les and Leslie Parrott help you launch lifelong love like never before. This is more than an audiobook - it's an experience. Get ready for deeper intimacy with the best friend you'll ever have. Saving Your Marriage Before It Starts, in more than 15 languages, is the most widely used marriage prep tool in the world.
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basically just a long advertisement
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The Undervalued Self
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Elaine Aron follows up her best sellers on the highly sensitive person with a groundbreaking new book on the undervalued self. She explains that self-esteem results from having a healthy balance of love and power in our lives. Readers will learn to incorporate love into situations that seem to require power and deal with power struggles that mask themselves as issues of love.
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Life Changing!
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Love Is Never Enough
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Love Is Never Enough explores the most common problems in marriage: the power of negative thinking, disillusionment, rigid rules and expectations, and miscommunication. These issues can be approached through cognitive therapy, in which thinking through and reasoning are used to counteract the poor communication that so often erodes relationships. With eloquence and accessibility, Aaron T. Beck, MD, shows how effective communication can restore and strengthen the ties and bonds between couples.
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Great book with help for sticky points
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Relationship Breakthrough
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Everyone faces the challenges of making relationships work. Whether with spouses, family members, friends, lovers, or colleagues, relationships have the power to make one feel happy, frustrated, or miserable. In Relationship Breakthrough, Cloe Madanes - an expert in creating healing, empowering relationships - gives listeners vital tools to transform their relationships and their lives. Madanes's cutting-edge methods produce real results and create rewarding, sustainable relationships.
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Disappointed
- By Dee on 01-10-16
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Feeling Good Together
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Based on 25 years of clinical experience and new, groundbreaking research involving more than 1,000 individuals, Feeling Good Together is filled with helpful examples and tools, such as the Relationship Satisfaction Test, the Blame Cost-Benefit Analysis, the Relationship Journal, Five Secrets of Effective Communication, the Intimacy Exercise, and more. Using these techniques, Dr. Burns shows you how to resolve virtually any kind of relationship conflict almost instantly.
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Best yet for communications Skills
- By Jeffrey J. Ardo on 03-20-10
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Some interesting material
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When you said, “I do”, you entered marriage with high hopes, dreaming it would be supremely happy. You never intended for it to be miserable. Millions of couples are struggling in desperate marriages. But the story doesn’t have to end there. Dr. Gary Chapman writes, “I believe that in every troubled marriage, one or both partners can take positive steps that have the potential for changing the emotional climate in their marriage.”
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encouragement through another chance
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Ten Lessons to Transform Your Marriage
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In 1994, Dr. John Gottman and his colleagues at the University of Washington made a startling announcement: Through scientific observation and mathematical analysis, they could predict, with more than 90-percent accuracy, whether a marriage would succeed or fail. The only thing they did not yet know was how to turn a failing marriage into a successful one, so Gottman teamed up with his clinical psychologist wife, Dr. Julie Schwartz Gottman, to develop intervention methods.
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This book was a great tool!
- By Keonna Simpson on 07-12-17
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What listeners say about Ten Lessons to Transform Your Marriage
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- BirdLady
- 03-06-20
Great Advice!
There are a lot of examples in this book with good advice on how therapy works.
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Overall
- Dave
- 05-17-11
A Game Changer
This book changed the way I speak to my wife, particularly when the conversation is argumentative, merely after hearing the first recorded and analyzed conversation in the book. The biggest thing for me was defensiveness and I saw it right away in the dialogue that they present in the book.
They use recorded transcripts of real couples talking (voiced by the narrator) and then analyze the back-and-forth relatively quickly. You can see yourself, if you're like me, in many of the conversations.
It truly helped, but it would be best if the authors were with me as I conversed (argued) with my wife, as I worry that I will fall back into old habits as I often do after reading great advice like this. I need her to read it too.
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30 people found this helpful
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- Mac M.
- 06-26-15
Good A book, but does not sync with print version
Would you recommend this audiobook to a friend? If so, why?
Yes. Good book
What other book might you compare Ten Lessons to Transform Your Marriage to and why?
N/A
Who would you have cast as narrator instead of Susan Denaker?
N/A
Did you have an extreme reaction to this book? Did it make you laugh or cry?
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Any additional comments?
Content is good. However, this book is not available on Wispersync, so when trying to follow between book and audio, extremely difficult to find start/stop of chapters, etc. (Book chapters are not even close to audio chapters). For example, the beginning of chapter 3 of the book actually starts within the audio version of chapter 4 @ 1:01:45. VERY hard to find where one left off in the printed book within the audio book.
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8 people found this helpful
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Overall
- DGM
- 03-17-08
One of the basics
A must have book if you are serious about working on your marriage. I have read several books and many refer to the work in this one.
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32 people found this helpful
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- Jillyjillarcher
- 11-04-18
10 Lessons to Transform Your RELATIONSHIP
I plan to listen to this book once a month - Great tips and tools not only for transforming a marriage, but for any relationship - from roommate to sister to friend to parent or co-worker. I loved every chapter, appreciate the way the authors used case studies to give concrete examples of the kinds of issues that come up in relationships and how to resolve them, and found incredible takeaway that I can apply in my personal life. The quizzes at the ends of the chapters are also extremely useful.
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5 people found this helpful
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- Jennifer
- 07-28-19
Takes some concentration listening
This book is clearly a work book - in that there are quizzes and lists that you can review. Listening to the conversations between the couples is chronicled by a "plus" or "minus" if they get it right or if they say something that's not particularly helpful. It's a little hard to visualize these in the car. However, there are case examples, and while none of them may be directly what your issue may be, listening to the overview and what people are talking about and how they are talking about it can be good. Even just a few reminders of allowing the other person to finish their thought or sentence, really hearing instead of just listening. While the narration itself is fine, it might have been better if there was a woman voice and a man voice instead of the narrator just deepening her voice when a man is talking. Overall, worth a listen.
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4 people found this helpful
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Story
- Laura P.
- 05-20-19
Loved it!
Truly great book packed with excellent, concrete advice. The narrator has good inflection which adds to the great content.
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
- Stefanie
- 02-12-15
Forward Thinking
Brilliant! Should Be Required Reading Before Anyone Chooses To Be Married. They should create a required class at Universities on this information.
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
- Marsha
- 05-26-12
Good content ( I think)
Is there anything you would change about this book?
The narrator. I don't know what it was, but she was very difficult to listen to. I feel like I missed out on a lot of good advice because I could not focus on her narration.
What three words best describe Susan Denaker’s performance?
Monotone, drab, uninteresting
Could you see Ten Lessons to Transform Your Marriage being made into a movie or a TV series? Who should the stars be?
No
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Performance
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Story
- Anne
- 08-08-20
Easy to follow
I liked the author giving examples of issues that come up in a marriage and suggestions of what to try.
I got tired of the point by point remark by the author of positive or negative after listening to what the couple tried. It was like reviewing a spelling test list. Correct...correct...incorrect, but not much helpful information.
I did enjoy the first few chapters but after that I didn’t get much from it.
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