The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work
A Practical Guide from the Country’s Foremost Relationship Expert, Revised and Updated
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The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work
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Narrated by:
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Eric Michael Summerer
About this listen
Just as Masters and Johnson were pioneers in the study of human sexuality, so Dr. John Gottman has revolutionized the study of marriage. As a professor of psychology at the University of Washington and the founder and director of the Seattle Marital and Family Institute, he has studied the habits of married couples in unprecedented detail over the course of many years. His findings, and his heavily attended workshops, have already turned around thousands of faltering marriages.
This book is the culmination of his life's work: the seven principles that guide couples on the path toward a harmonious and long-lasting relationship. Straightforward in their approach, yet profound in their effect, these principles teach partners new and startling strategies for making their marriage work. Gottman helps couples focus on each other, on paying attention to the small day-to-day moments that, strung together, make up the heart and soul of any relationship. Being thoughtful about ordinary matters provides spouses with a solid foundation for resolving conflict when it does occur and finding strategies for living with those issues that cannot be resolved.
The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work is the definitive guide for anyone who wants their relationship to attain its highest potential.
PLEASE NOTE: When you purchase this title, the accompanying PDF will be available in your Audible Library along with the audio.
©1999, 2015 John Mordechai Gottman, PhD, and Nan Silver (P)2020 TantorListeners also enjoyed...
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 32
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 30
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 30
In I Love You, but I'm Not in Love with You - a real-life relationship guide from couples' counselor Andrew G. Marshall - partners and individuals who have "fallen out of love" or want to rekindle the love that once was will learn how to use Marshall 's program with impressive results. This is a much-needed book to help men and women of all ages in any type of committed romantic relationship to truly understand love and to point out the everyday habits that undermine growing together.
-
5 out of 5 stars
-
If you feel stuck in a relationship, this book is a MUST!
- By Christopher on 05-09-19
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We Love Each Other, But . . .
- Simple Secrets to Strengthen Your Relationship and Make Love Last
- By: Ellen Wachtel
- Narrated by: Joyce Bean
- Length: 6 hrs and 27 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 40
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 31
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 31
We Love Each Other, But... offers simple, practical tips that will help you restore and strengthen a relationship that has gone off track. It lays out the nuts and bolts of building relationships so they continue to be gratifying over the long haul. Dr. Ellen Wachtel shows how, even when you feel like giving up on a relationship or marriage, you can recapture why you fell in love in the first place. Dr. Wachtel promises that there is more and suggests simple ways to keep vitality in relationships.
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3 out of 5 stars
-
Some interesting material
- By Scott on 10-25-12
By: Ellen Wachtel
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If Only He Knew
- A Valuable Guide to Knowing, Understanding, and Loving Your Wife
- By: Dr. Gary Smalley
- Narrated by: Maurice England
- Length: 5 hrs and 45 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 367
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 307
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 300
The perfect guide for husbands who want to love their wives and strengthen their marriages in a way like never before. In this revised and updated edition of his classic best seller, Gary Smalley explains a woman's deepest needs, shows men how to meet those needs, and gives 10 simple steps to strengthen any marriage. He helps men to understand not only how to respond to a woman's feelings, but also how to make her feel important. Gary Smalley maps a blueprint to a better marriage that will have a deep and lasting impact on men and their wives.
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5 out of 5 stars
-
Fallout after an affair
- By Joe Davis on 11-12-15
By: Dr. Gary Smalley
-
The Happy Stepmother
- By: Rachelle Katz
- Narrated by: Gayle Hendrix
- Length: 8 hrs and 56 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4 out of 5 stars 71
-
Performance4 out of 5 stars 60
-
Story4 out of 5 stars 59
You found the love of your life, and you vowed to have, to hold, and to stepmother. You always thought that in time you'd grow to be the perfect, loving family. So why does it seem that the harder you try, the more unappreciated you feel? As a stepmother, therapist, and founder of the popular stepsforstepmothers.com, Dr. Rachelle Katz knows all too well how challenging stepmotherhood can be. Based on thousands of in-depth interviews and the latest research, she's created a powerful program to help you.
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1 out of 5 stars
-
horrible
- By Marcia R on 02-07-17
By: Rachelle Katz
-
9 Lies That Will Destroy Your Marriage
- And the Truths That Will Save It and Set It Free
- By: Greg Smalley, Robert S. Paul
- Narrated by: Lyle Blaker
- Length: 7 hrs and 49 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 76
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 70
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 69
Lies about marriage are rampant in our culture and the church. They’re killing marriages. But the corresponding truths can strengthen marriages and even save the most troubled relationships. In this audiobook, marriage experts Greg Smalley and Robert Paul identify the lies, explain how they work to destroy marriages, and reveal the truths that not only can improve marriages, but rescue those that are floundering.
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2 out of 5 stars
-
Not new, contradictory and biblically inaccurate
- By thor on 04-07-21
By: Greg Smalley, and others
-
Men Are Like Waffles Women Are Like Spaghetti
- Understanding and Delighting in Your Differences
- By: Bill Farrel, Pam Farrel
- Narrated by: Bill Farrel, Pam Farrel
- Length: 5 hrs and 51 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4 out of 5 stars 324
-
Performance4 out of 5 stars 267
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 265
Women are like spaghetti, because their thought process runs on and on in an interconnecting web, and men are like waffles because they compartmentalize and "sit" in sometimes blank boxes, just to relax.
-
4 out of 5 stars
-
Good content, annoying sound
- By Amazon Customer on 09-05-17
By: Bill Farrel, and others
-
Why Mars and Venus Collide
- Understanding How Men and Women Cope Differently with Stress
- By: John Gray
- Narrated by: John Gray
- Length: 6 hrs and 57 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 189
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 125
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 127
Once upon a time, Martians and Venusians functioned in separate worlds. But in today's hectic and career-oriented environment, relationships have become a lot more complicated, and men and women are experiencing unprecedented levels of stress. To add to the increasing tension, most men and women are also completely unaware that they are actually hardwired to react differently to the stress.
-
5 out of 5 stars
-
Very insightful & evokative for introspection
- By Amazon Customer on 02-04-12
By: John Gray
-
Relationship Breakthrough
- How to Create Outstanding Relationships in Every Area of Your Life
- By: Cloe Madanes, Anthony Robbins
- Narrated by: Aimee Jolson
- Length: 6 hrs and 32 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 402
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 342
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 343
Everyone faces the challenges of making relationships work. Whether with spouses, family members, friends, lovers, or colleagues, relationships have the power to make one feel happy, frustrated, or miserable. In Relationship Breakthrough, Cloe Madanes - an expert in creating healing, empowering relationships - gives listeners vital tools to transform their relationships and their lives. Madanes's cutting-edge methods produce real results and create rewarding, sustainable relationships.
-
3 out of 5 stars
-
Disappointed
- By Dee on 01-10-16
By: Cloe Madanes, and others
-
Happily Ever After
- Six Secrets to a Successful Marriage
- By: Gary Chapman
- Narrated by: Maurice England, Dean Gallagher
- Length: 11 hrs and 15 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 71
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 61
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 63
“My husband and I can’t seem to agree on anything.” “You spent how much?” “My wife’s parents are driving me crazy!” “You never listen to me!” Let’s face it—even the best of marriages hit an occasional bump in the road now and then. The secret to marital bliss lies in how you and your spouse handle those bumps.
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2 out of 5 stars
-
THIS BOOK IS NOT MEANT FOR NON-CHRISTIANS
- By Tyler on 01-21-17
By: Gary Chapman
-
10 Stupid Things Couples Do To Mess Up Their Relationships
- By: Dr. Laura Schlessinger
- Narrated by: Dr. Laura Schlessinger
- Length: 2 hrs and 37 mins
- Abridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 199
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 128
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 124
In Ten Stupid Things Couples Do to Mess Up Their Relationships, Dr. Laura Schlessinger calls for a return to traditional courtship. Courtship allows couples and their families to get acquainted with each other over a longer period of time, and provides structure and guidelines for that important process.
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5 out of 5 stars
-
No brainer ideas that we can forget
- By Ali0531 on 07-06-15
-
How to Improve Your Marriage Without Talking About It
- By: Patricia Love, Steven Stosny
- Narrated by: Laural Merlington
- Length: 6 hrs and 49 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 1,800
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 1,513
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 1,493
Men are right. The "relationship talk" does not help. Dr. Patricia Love’s and Dr. Steven Stosny’s How to Improve Your Marriage Without Talking About It reveals the stunning truth about marital happiness: Love is not about better communication. It's about connection.
-
5 out of 5 stars
-
Must read if your on the verge of loosing it all!
- By Chris on 07-19-15
By: Patricia Love, and others
-
Things I Wish I'd Known Before We Got Married
- By: Gary Chapman
- Narrated by: Chris Fabry
- Length: 3 hrs and 44 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 1,089
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 895
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 880
Things I Wish I’d Known Before We Got Married was written to help you realize your goal of marital happiness. But don’t just listen to it - experience it. Grapple with the practical tips and ideas discussed, honestly share your thoughts and feelings, respect each other’s opinions, and find workable solutions to your differences. The more you do so, says Chapman, the more you will be prepared for marriage.
-
5 out of 5 stars
-
Useful and Practical!
- By Charles on 12-11-13
By: Gary Chapman
-
Love Is Never Enough
- How Couples Can Overcome Misunderstandings, Resolve Conflicts, and Solve Relationship Problems Through Cognitive Therapy
- By: Aaron T. Beck MD
- Narrated by: Bob Dio
- Length: 12 hrs and 47 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 79
-
Performance4 out of 5 stars 69
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 66
Love Is Never Enough explores the most common problems in marriage: the power of negative thinking, disillusionment, rigid rules and expectations, and miscommunication. These issues can be approached through cognitive therapy, in which thinking through and reasoning are used to counteract the poor communication that so often erodes relationships. With eloquence and accessibility, Aaron T. Beck, MD, shows how effective communication can restore and strengthen the ties and bonds between couples.
-
5 out of 5 stars
-
Great book with help for sticky points
- By Ernest Maifrini on 10-22-16
By: Aaron T. Beck MD
-
The DNA of Relationships
- By: Dr. Gary Smalley
- Narrated by: Chris Fabry
- Length: 6 hrs and 44 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 288
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 222
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 220
We are designed for relationships, yet they often bring us pain. In this paradigm-shifting book, Gary Smalley unravels the DNA of relationships: we are made for three great relationships, with God, others, and ourselves, and all relationships involve choice. Gary exposes a destructive relationship dance that characterizes nearly every relationship conflict, and he offers five new dance steps that will revolutionize relationships.
-
2 out of 5 stars
-
Could be half as long
- By Christine on 01-06-08
By: Dr. Gary Smalley
-
Love Busters
- Protect Your Marriage by Replacing Love-Busting Patterns with Love-Building Habits
- By: Dr. Willard F. Harley Jr.
- Narrated by: Dr. Willard F. Harley Jr.
- Length: 10 hrs and 49 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall5 out of 5 stars 54
-
Performance5 out of 5 stars 50
-
Story5 out of 5 stars 50
With Dr. Harley's expert guidance, couples will be able to avoid the major causes of marital unhappiness and disappointment. Instead of tearing their marriage apart, they will learn to build it into the marriage they had needed and wanted. This book is a perfect companion to His Needs, Her Needs and will be useful to pastors, counselors, and couples.
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1 out of 5 stars
-
Painful, shortsighted and limited on actual new information
- By J. Wolter on 04-07-23
-
I Want This to Work
- An Inclusive Guide to Navigating the Most Difficult Relationship Issues We Face in the Modern Age
- By: Elizabeth Earnshaw LMFT CGT
- Narrated by: Elizabeth Earnshaw LMFT CGT
- Length: 9 hrs and 27 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 45
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 38
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 37
Elizabeth Earnshaw is here to help. The renowned Gottman therapist, founder of A Better Life Therapy, and influential Instagram therapist behind @lizlistens has helped to transform countless relationships. With I Want This to Work, she presents for today’s generation the most effective and proven steps for relationship success.
-
3 out of 5 stars
-
I want this to work too. Excellent information, excruciating execution
- By Sunny Bettley on 03-17-23
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In 10 Principles for Doing Effective Couples Therapy, two of the world's leading couple researchers and therapists give listeners an inside tour of what goes on inside the consulting rooms of their practice. They have been doing couples work for decades and still find it challenging and full of learning experiences. This book distills the knowledge they've gained over their years of practice into 10 principles at the core of good couples work. Each principle is illustrated with a clinically compiled case plus personal side-notes and storytelling.
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What makes love last? Why does one couple stay together forever, while another falls apart? And most importantly, is there a scientific formula for love? Drs. John Gottman and Julie Schwartz Gottman are the world’s leading relationship scientists. For the past forty years, they have been studying love. They’ve gathered data on over three thousand couples, looking at everything from their body language to the way they converse to their stress hormone levels. Their goal: to identify the building blocks of love.
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Helpful for neurotypicals
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In 1994, Dr. John Gottman and his colleagues at the University of Washington made a startling announcement: Through scientific observation and mathematical analysis, they could predict, with more than 90 percent accuracy, whether a marriage would succeed or fail. The only thing they did not yet know was how to turn a failing marriage into a successful one, so Gottman teamed up with his clinical psychologist wife, Dr. Julie Schwartz Gottman, to develop intervention methods.
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One of the basics
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The highly influential book The Marriage Clinic presented a complete marital therapy program based on John Gottman's much-heralded research on marital success and failure. Since then, Dr. Gottman has collaborated with his wife, clinical psychologist Dr. Julie Gottman, to conduct their well-known Love Lab studies, allowing the pair to design a highly successful couples' workshop and develop their Sound Relationship House theory.
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Heralded by the New York Times and Time as the couples therapy with the highest rate of success, Emotionally Focused Therapy works because it views the love relationship as an attachment bond. This idea, once controversial, is now supported by science, and has become widely popular among therapists around the world. In Hold Me Tight, Dr. Sue Johnson presents Emotionally Focused Therapy to the general public for the first time. Johnson teaches that the way to save and enrich a relationship is to reestablish safe emotional connection and preserve the attachment bond.
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1 out of 5 stars
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No PDFs
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When you said, “I do”, you entered marriage with high hopes, dreaming it would be supremely happy. You never intended for it to be miserable. Millions of couples are struggling in desperate marriages. But the story doesn’t have to end there. Dr. Gary Chapman writes, “I believe that in every troubled marriage, one or both partners can take positive steps that have the potential for changing the emotional climate in their marriage.”
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5 out of 5 stars
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encouragement through another chance
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Men are right. The "relationship talk" does not help. Dr. Patricia Love’s and Dr. Steven Stosny’s How to Improve Your Marriage Without Talking About It reveals the stunning truth about marital happiness: Love is not about better communication. It's about connection.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Must read if your on the verge of loosing it all!
- By Chris on 07-19-15
By: Patricia Love, and others
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The Five Love Languages: The Secret to Love That Lasts
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Overall5 out of 5 stars 42,481
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 34,977
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Story5 out of 5 stars 34,700
Dr. Gary Chapman identifies five basic languages of love and then guides couples towards a better understanding of their unique languages of love. Learn to speak and understand your mate's love language, and in no time you will be able to effectively love and truly feel loved in return. Skillful communication is within your grasp!
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5 out of 5 stars
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Unexpected Brilliance
- By Vanessa on 02-08-07
By: Gary Chapman
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Raising an Emotionally Intelligent Child
- The Heart of Parenting
- By: John Gottman PhD
- Narrated by: Roy Worley
- Length: 8 hrs and 4 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 826
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 675
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 667
Based on 20 years of research at the University of Washington studying parent-child interactions, award-winning research psychologist John Gottman and his team have developed Emotion Coaching - a technique parents can use to teach their children self-awareness and self-control and to foster good emotional development. This proven technique has demonstrated a positive effect on children's physical health, academic achievement, and emotional well-being.
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5 out of 5 stars
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My parenting philosophy, in writing!
- By Dave on 03-03-21
By: John Gottman PhD
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Communicate Your Feelings (Without Starting a Fight)
- What to Say and What Not to Say to Your Partner
- By: Nic Saluppo
- Narrated by: Colin Kibler
- Length: 2 hrs and 20 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall5 out of 5 stars 671
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 633
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Story5 out of 5 stars 630
Being in a relationship without knowing how to share your feelings and receive your partner’s feelings in useful ways is like jumping into a pool without knowing how to swim. You can flail around all you want, but it’s not going to keep you afloat for very long—you need to be able to move in any direction at will. Like swimming, knowing how to share your feelings and respond to your partner's feelings will move your relationship in the direction you want: toward more intimacy, closeness, connection, and trust.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Marriage saving!
- By J Keegan on 02-07-23
By: Nic Saluppo
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Communication in Marriage
- How to Communicate with Your Spouse Without Fighting
- By: Marcus Kusi, Ashley Kusi
- Narrated by: Greg Zarcone
- Length: 2 hrs and 38 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 294
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 241
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 239
Do you find it difficult communicating with your spouse? Are you tired of arguing and fighting with your spouse whenever you try to communicate? Is your spouse not talking to you anymore? You are not alone. Many couples (including us) have had to deal with these communication problems at some point in marriage, and it's not fun! But don't worry. No matter what communication problems you struggle with, you can learn how to communicate effectively with your spouse today.
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2 out of 5 stars
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not what I expected
- By 77aniem on 12-19-17
By: Marcus Kusi, and others
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Talk to Me Like I'm Someone You Love, Revised Edition
- Relationship Repair in a Flash
- By: Nancy Dreyfus PsyD
- Narrated by: Gabra Zackman
- Length: 5 hrs and 7 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 284
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 257
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 256
Talk to Me like I'm Someone You Love is a brilliant interactive relationship tool that can help couples stop arguing and begin healing. This revised edition features two new sections - one on making love and another on deepening trust - containing more than 25 new "flash cards for real life", statements that hold the power to express what we wish we could say to the person we love but for which we can't find either the right words or the right tone in which to say them.
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4 out of 5 stars
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Is there a companion PDF with the flashcards one could print?
- By Brandy Fagan on 09-13-22
What listeners say about The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story4 out of 5 stars
- A T
- 09-27-22
It’s a workbook—buy a digital version with the audio
I made the mistake of thinking I could just listen to this book but it has a lot of quizzes and lists of things to try. It’s more like a marriage workbook with studies and observations in between. The narration was upbeat and well done.
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4 people found this helpful
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Lillian Martin
- 11-30-22
Wanna go deep with your spouse? Buy the book!
This book is a staple. One my husband and I will read or listen to together more than once. If you cannot afford a marriage counselor…this is basically that if you both are willing to try. Lots of questions, quizzes, exercises to help the two of you grow in your marriage and get through difficult times. It also give examples of other couples that are comical because they’re absolutely relatable helping to feel like you aren’t alone. I like the voice over too, he does a great job.
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2 people found this helpful
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Fatma K.
- 07-29-20
Book is more practical
Due to the many tests and lists I prefer to have the book on hand rather than audio, if maybe a pdf was accompanied that would have made things easier. But overall I highly recommend this book.
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2 people found this helpful
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Chris
- 08-26-21
Marriage Saver!
This book is helping my marriage so much! This is written from a doctor who has spend too much time on work and retirement planning. I’m also a gym bro and wish I had spent more time reading this book than watching workout videos and spending time in the gym. Would have been much better for my health.
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1 person found this helpful
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance3 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Pablo N
- 04-11-22
Excelente
Es un legado para la armonia de parejas en todo el mundo .
Hay que leerlo vivirlo y mejorarlo
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Overall4 out of 5 stars
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Performance2 out of 5 stars
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Story4 out of 5 stars
- Julie Faria
- 03-08-23
Good information, but...
I listen to Audible in my car, going to work and home. This narrator's voice is so flat that I felt like I was going to fall asleep at the wheel. This may be a book I will have to buy. I don't know if I can finish listening to it...almost half way through it. Ugh.
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Shane
- 08-08-24
hes the expert for a reason!
this book was referenced many times by other books i was reading and i finally said let me read this. OMGOSH i needed this context not just for karriage but relationships in general!
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Overall4 out of 5 stars
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Performance4 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Rob
- 07-23-24
Great insighta
Found book very insightful and giving a very good and useful.perspective on improving mattiages.
Very different to other such marriage advice books
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Patrick Watson
- 10-15-24
Helpful Marriage Tips
I intend to work on my marriage using these tools. These tips are easy to implement and seem to work for many of the case studies cited.
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Hooper-Paulo
- 12-17-20
great but need the paper back book too
great book. very informative but I think I need to buy this in paper form so that I can complete the quizzes and homework.
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1 person found this helpful