What a beauty the mind is to behold yet it has a capacity to rob us of the peace that most of us desire. Whenever we find ourselves in judgment of our own actions or the actions of others, the mind builds stories that can construct our own living hell.

In building a relationship to life’s experiences that rests in conscious awareness, a more clearly defined path can be cut through what is contrived and one can find themselves more often meeting reality on reality's terms. To step away from judgment gives space to our needs to come to the surface as they present in the language of our feelings.

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Today we have an opportunity to speak with Katrina Vaillancourt to further our conversation and exploration of Non-Violent Communication (NVC). We discuss a broad overview of the methodologies of this practice and go into the practical use of Katrina’s Love Smart Cards which she developed and utilizes in her personal and professional practice. 

Katrina Vaillancourt is passionate about compassion and the teachings of Nonviolent Communication™ (NVC). Katrina Soul Coherence Coach, specializing in evolutionary relationship, and deep dive personal transformation work utilizing NVC, Breathwork, Journaling practices, Compassionate Inquiry, Inner Child work, Interpersonal Mediation and Intra-mediation. She is also an artist and creator of Love Smart Cards.

Media Mentioned in this Episode: 

• Love Smart Cards by Katrina Vaillancourt: https://www.lovesmartcards.com
• Nonviolent Communication: A Language of Life: Life-Changing Tools for Healthy Relationships by Marshall B. Rosenberg
• John Bowlby and Attachment Theory by Jeremy Holmes

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Who wants to be triggered? Pretty much nobody enjoys it yet it can happen to us on a daily basis. We easily fall into past patterns that first arise in thought, can show us our feelings behind them, and ultimately have their foundation in our most essential needs.

How did we learn what we need? Why do we get so terrified and want to lash out when they are threatened?

Today we will explore the stickiness of our triggers and how to better utilize them consciously rather than letting them fully take the reins of our life. 

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Media Mentioned in this Episode:

• Nonviolent Communication: A Language of Life, by Marshall B. Rosenberg
• The Art of Empathy: A Training Course in Life's Most Essential Skill, by Karla McLaren
• Language of Emotions: What Your Feelings Are Trying to Tell You, by Karla McLaren

Everyone comes from some form of a family but how often have you considered who the family members of your psych are? From an early age we acquire different aspects that build our minds and IFS (Internal Family System) sees these parts as comprising a family unit that makes you feel like YOU. Some are there to protect us, others are there to put out the fires while another group hides in the shadows, never wanting to be seen.

Come along on today’s episode as we take our first dive into this modality and explore the family tree that lives inside our head. 

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Media Mentioned in this Episode:

• Introduction to the Internal Family Systems Model by Richard C. Schwartz
• Greater Than The Sum Of Our Parts
• IFS website: https://ifs-institute.com

Why do we connect so deeply to myths around heroes that vanquish insurmountable challenges? These stories are plenty throughout history and in our modern day movies and TV shows. So what is it in these characters that we see in ourselves?

The protagonist of these tales has revealed a part of themselves, the shadow, and in doing so begins to recognize this hidden part of themselves. To go into the cave and slay the demon is to find the utility in what that force has to offer in our lives. To deny the strength of this creature is to one day be destroyed by it. 

Come along on the journey in today’s episode and see if you can find your inner dragon, enter the cave, and acquire the power you didn’t know you could possess.

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Books and Media Mentioned in this Episode:

• The Hero with a Thousand Faces by Joseph Campbell
• The Founder (movie)
• The 4th Turning by William Strauss and Neil Howe

The powerful king or queen rules with an iron fist and never shows their weaknesses, right? Wrong! Imagery from movies and television have laid in our minds a foundation of what a ruler in their shadow form looks like. The true king or queen listens to their court (the 3 other archetypes) first, then decides what they shall do. With an all seeing eye of the bigger picture the king or queen never acts before fully seeing first. They know they are fallible, they are aware of their limitations, and ultimately they are in service to the kingdom.  

The Empowered King/Queen: 

• Keeps Order 
• Wise
• Sees the “Big Picture” 
• Humble 

The Shadow King/Queen:

• Self Centered  
• Terrified of Own Weaknesses  
• Defensive and Threatening  
• Doesn’t Own Responsibility 
• Avoids Conflict  
• Overly Codependent  

Download a handout of the archetypes at radicallyus.com under the “free stuff” tab and stay tuned for more posts in the future.  

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Have you ever been called manipulative? Do you tend to wield knowledge to maim or harm? The magician archetype in full form knows how to discern information in a way that moves knowledge into tangible wisdom. Here we begin to understand how to move from the manipulative and ignorant to the aware and fully embodied. Transform what has held you back in the past to useful action for your future. Sharpen your insight and begin to see the powerful magician that each of us possess within. 

The Empowered Magician: 

• Teacher
• Problem Solver
• Transformational 
• Detached Observer 

The Shadow Magician:

• Hides truth to maintain power 
• Overly Critical 
• Blocks Others Aspirations 
• Perfectionist 
• Uses Knowledge as a weapon 
• Disconnected From Life 

Download a handout of the archetypes at radicallyus.com under the “free stuff” tab and stay tuned for more posts in the future.  

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Do you know how to express your feelings when they arise? Are you in your emotion’s strangle hold or do they help develop intimacy with yourself and others? Accessing the lover archetype brings us closer to the beauty of this world and how we stand in relationship to it. We may not agree on the story (“you did XYZ to me”) but we can always relate on the feelings (“I feel lonely”). The questions then arise, is your lover balanced or is the shadow lover controlling you? Discovering the qualities of these shadows (addicted lover or impotent lover) creates understanding of how we may unconsciously create our own relationship hell, how to heal them and ultimately become the best version of ourselves.

The Empowered Lover: 

• Sensual & sexual
• Feels emotions deeply
• Connected to all things

The Shadow Lover:

• Feelings are in control
• Addicted to pleasure
• Hates boundaries
• Can’t identify own feelings
• Shuts down when deep emotions get close
• Uncertain where I end and others begin

Download a handout of the archetypes at radicallyus.com under the “free stuff” tab and stay tuned for more posts in the future.  

What did you think about today’s information? Join the the Radically Us Community Facebook Group and give us your opinion: https://www.facebook.com/groups/471618244108867

Don’t miss our weekly episodes. Go to radicallyus.com and click on your favorite podcast app in order to stay up to date.

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