Do you ever experience the anticipation of going to a movie you just know it is going to be so good and you can’t wait to go.

You were so excited to go, but as you leave the theater you are so disappointed.

You expected the movie to be much better, but it was a letdown.

How could the writer and director and actors let us down. So disappointing.

Have you ever had people in your life disappoint you. They just didn’t meet up to your expectations.

These expectations are like A Manuel we have for people in our life.

Interestingly, we often have an unspoken instruction guide or manual for the people in our lives about how we would like them to behave, so we can feel good and be happy.

Freeing Truths you will learn:

#1 WE CANNOT CONTROL OTHER PEOPLE'S BEHAVIOR

and thinking that we would be happier if they would do what we want and expect cause us so much unnecessary suffering.

#2 Other people's behavior has no impact on us emotionally until we think about

their behavior, interpret it, and choose to make it mean something.

#3 Our happiness is not determined by what other's do, how they act, or what they say.

#4 It is my job to make or create happiness in my life.

So Be aware of when you have expectations for other people.

When you want them to act a certain way or do something so you will be happy.

Just know, This is normal, nothing has gone wrong.

But you can choose how you want to feel.

When you are ready you might consider throwing away or even burning the rules and expectations you have for others.

Doing this will help you create the balance and peace, joy and happiness in your life you want.

AFTER ALLL ONLY YOU ARE REPSONSIBLE FOR YOUR OWN HAPPINESS!

Which is wonderful news!

When I hear women say they are not good enough because they yell at their kids, they can’t keep up with the laundry or house cleaning, they are not doing all the things other moms are doing, etc.

It makes me sad because this is not true and I feel bad that women are suffering and they don’t need to.

I know these moms have good hearts and they are doing the best they can but they feel overwhelmed and frustrated.

This is how I use to feel before I found about the coaching model which was created by Brooke Castillo.

The model is an explanation of how we experience life. It breaks down our experiences into 5 areas.

Circumstances, thought, feeling, actions and results.

Circumstance are things that are happening in your life that you cannot control.

They are strictly facts with no drama or opinions.

Examples: the weather, what you child said,

Second part is thoughts – Basically what happens in your mind, words or sentences your think.

Sometimes this words or sentences are helpful to us and sometimes they are not.

It was interesting to me that two people can have the same or close to the same circumstance in their lives and have two totally different thoughts about it.

Example: one mom has 4 children and works outside her home

And she thinks, This is all too much. So she feel overwhelmed

Another mom has 4 children and works outside her home

But she thinks, I will figure this out, one day at a time. She could feel in-control, or capable.

Third is feelings or emotions – vibrations in our body that are created because of our thoughts not the circumstances in our lives.

When I found out about the model and how my human brain works I felt so free.

I could have one area in my life where I could have control.

I could choose how I think about the circumstances or challenge and things going on in my life which changes how I feel about my life.

Tool for negative thoughts

Next time you have a negative thought about yourself,

1. Beware that your brain is doing it’s job to keep you save

2. Question is the thought is even true

Make a list in your mind of all the ways you are good enough Or all the things you are doing “right”

Example of yelling at your kids

Think of all the times you are patient with them and spoke in control.

Give yourself some come compassion, After all you are human

Most of the time you don’t yell at your kids.

Show you brain it isn’t true you are not a good enough mom and then let the negative thought float out of your brain like a cloud.

Maybe you have this thought often and you know it is not true, you don’t even have to question the thought

so let it float out of your head like a cloud.

3, Choose a thought you want to have about yourself

Like, “I am figuring this mom thing out.” Or “I have everything under control.” Or “When I show up as myself I am an amazing mom.”

Choose a thought that you can believe and that helps you.

Then, go and be the mom, wife, sister, friend, employee you want to be and do all the things you need to

or want to do, being your best YOU.

If you have listened to me before you may have noticed I changed my introduction.

So this podcast is an evolving thing.

The goal has always been to help women have more love and confidence in themselves.

I have always felt this is the key to living and experience life to its fullest.

You have heard my say before that self-confidence and self-love are mirror images of each other.

If you are self-confident, you love yourself and if you love yourself, you are confident.

So I am clarifying the focus of this podcast to be a place where moms and all women learn how to make self-love and self-confidence the foundation of their lives, so they have the emotional and physical energy and stamina to enjoy balance, peace and sprinkles of joy and happiness in their personal and family lives.

I envision moms as self-confident superwomen with self-love as their superpower. I see them single handedly balancing children, household chores, church and community service, family life and self-care and maybe a job with a smile on her face and joy and love in her heart.

Create your own vision or ideal for your life.

It is possible and could even be even better than you could image.

Do you ever have times when your self-esteem varies like the stock market? You might feel great about yourself one day and completely shaky the next, and whether it’s something we’re explicitly aware of, like seeing a number on the scale we deem to be wrong, or it’s more ambiguous and difficult to define, this is what I call conditional self-confidence.

Thinking positively about ourselves is a natural human desire, and so much of our behavior is motivated by wanting to think well about ourselves. However, when we’re taught that whether we’re valuable or not comes from the opinions of other people, our relationship to ourselves feels unstable and constantly shifts under our feet, triggering feelings of inadequacy, insecurity, and unworthiness.

The good news is that your relationship with yourself is something you can start improving at any point, and this week, I’m showing you 3 ways to start building a positive, accepting, and unconditional self-esteem so you can operate from a place of love and care for yourself that doesn’t shift and change like the weather.

Remember,

You are enough, just the way you are

You are worthy, just the way you are

You are amazing, just the way you are.

To help you change the way you think about yourself

I created 8 Ways to Extinguish the Negative Self-Talk which can also help with creating unconditional self-love for yourself.

Click on the link to get your very own copy.

subscribepage.io/yvonneburninghamcoach

Humans are no different than rabbits or any animal, We all need love and nurturing to thrive.

When we were a baby and a child, even a teenager we needed love and support from our mother, father, siblings, and extended family

Their love and acceptance made you feel secure and so confident that you could succeed at anything.

As we grew older we still may have that support system

But we were exposed to other people and environments which didn’t always build up your self-esteem, instead poked holes of self- doubt and lack of belief in ourselves.

As adults we can not rely on other people to love and treat us with kindness and compassion.

Remember Byron Katies advice, It is not other people's job to like you, it’s yours.

So we can not expect other people to like and love us.

They will probably disappoint you.

So it is your responsibility to treat yourself with acceptance, love, kindness, and compassion.

When you do this for yourself, you will thrive And have a joyful, happy life. Just like the healthy rabbits.

I am offering 8 weeks of Free Coach on how to Change the negative self-talk to positive, accepting, and loving talk.

I will meet with you via Zoom weekly for 45 hour.

If you have always wished you could turn off the Negative Self-Talk, this free coaching would be perfect for YOU.

If you know this coaching is for you or you are curious about it, I would like to meet with you for about 20 minutes to answer any questions your may have, give you all the details, and let you decide if this coach would be helpful for YOU.

Here is my calendar link. Talk To YOU Soon.

https://calendly.com/yvonneburningham/consult-coaching-call

Self-confidence and Self-love are like identical twins.

They are a reflect each other

So if you are self confident you love yourself and when you love yourself you are self confident.

There are warning signs that these twin feelings are low

I use the terms self love tank

like your gas tank. You know how you get a warning sign on your dashboard that your gas is getting low, and you need to fill it up to keep going where you want to go.

Well there can be some similar signs in our lives that we need to step back for a minute and kind of evaluate where we are going and if we want to go there.

When We find ourselves doing certain things in our lives that feel terrible and keep us spinning and not progressing.

When we feel this way, it could be a warning sign that I need to pay attention to myself.

I'm not nurturing myself

I'm not giving myself the love and acceptance and attention that I need.

In this episode we discuss some warning signs to be aware of and then ways to refuel our self-love tank.

I have found that if I incorporate small and simple reminders to myself that I accept and love myself, I am Enough and I am Worthy, then I am able to keep my self-love tank 3/4 to full I thought these reminders would be helpful for you as well. So click on the link below and start enjoying being more Self-Confidence and the feeling of love for yourself. Then you can feel joy, peace and fulfillment in your life.

subscribepage.io/yvonneburninghamcoach

In this Podcast, I share what I have learned over my years of experiencing being a woman wearing many hats, not really hats, but having many different responsibilities and challenges.

I have found that Slowing down and focusing on filling my cup or my self-love tank… making sure my needs are a priority and even essential, helps my to show up like I desire to.

Slowing down and even taking a break, a time out, I have learned, helps us do things in a more purposeful and productive way. It makes life more joyful and fulfilling.

With all my love and concern for your wellbeing, I invite you to learn from my experiences.

Please claim your own copy of One-A-Day Self-Love Notes to help you Slow Down and become your best self.

Click on the link below.

subscribepage.io/yvonneburninghamcoach

Feeling Confidence or Good about yourself is available to you right now.

Feeling wonderful and comfortable about yourself all begins with

Choosing to think you are enough, worthy and wonderful just the way you are.

Choosing every day to LOVE YOURSELF, all of you.

Choosing to keep your commitments to yourself, no matter what.

Choosing to treat yourself like a best friend.

By daily, simple doable words of love and compassion and kindness to yourself, you will create a feeling of confidence.

You will feel good about yourself and be able to achieve everything you desire.

Learn how the Compound Effect of small, smart choices can create amazing result and how it can apply to Self-Confidence.

Learn ideas  for simple ways to express love to yourself.

Plus get your own free copy of One-A-Day Self Love Notes with a list of more ways to so love, compassion and kindness to yourself. Click on the link below.

subscribepage.io/yvonneburninghamcoach