How to Be an Adult in Relationships

The Five Keys to Mindful Loving

By: David Richo

Narrated by: David Richo

"Most people think of love as a feeling," says David Richo, "but love is not so much a feeling as a way of being present." In this book, Richo offers a fresh perspective on love and relationships--one that focuses not on finding an ideal mate, but on becoming a more loving and realistic person. Drawing on the Buddhist concept of mindfulness, How to Be an Adult in Relationships explores five hallmarks of mindful loving and how they play a key role in our relationships throughout life:

1. Attention to the present moment; observing, listening, and noticing all the feelings at play in our relationships.
2. Acceptance of ourselves and others just as we are.
3. Appreciation of all our gifts, our limits, our longings, and our poignant human predicament.
4. Affection shown through holding and touching in respectful ways.
5. Allowing life and love to be just as they are, with all their ecstasy and ache, without trying to take control.

When deeply understood and applied, these five simple concepts--what Richo calls the five A's--form the basis of mature love. They help us to move away from judgment, fear, and blame to a position of openness, compassion, and realism about life and relationships. By giving and receiving these five A's, relationships become deeper and more meaningful, and they become a ground for personal transformation.

very insightful and eye opening

I'll someone who was raised by to narcissist and really had no grass one would a healthy adult relationship is, this book was very insightful and I opening. I will definitely referred to this book again and make notes and let everything really sink in for me.

The only thing I can say bad about this book was at the narrator sometimes was hard to listen to, his tone is alright but it just seems very monotone and sometimes I would fall asleep

A life changing book

This book has changed my life for the better. Allowing me to uncover or discover the root of childhood trauma and how it had/has/ or will impact my adult relationships.

This book has deeply touched my heart

This book has deeply touched my heart. It informed me on how I can be mature, straightforward, aware of my feelings and how I can handle them appropriately. It has also enlightened me on how in the past I behaved as a hurt and abandoned child. I didn't know why I was in the situations that I found myself in but now I know. Listening to this book was not enough for me. I ordered a printed version of the book because I realize that to get the full insight from the book I have to read it slowly, methodically and journal as I go. I plan on going through this book that way at least 5 times. This book has opened my eyes to so many hurts and pains that I have and has shown me a way to heal myself. I want to personally thank David Richo for sharing this book with me. Thank you.

What I wish I knew when I was 20

Understanding the concepts in this book would have saved me decades of failing in relationships if I had this knowledge at age 20.
This is the kind of book that is incredibly revealing and will make you look at every relationship differently if you can swallow your pride and get it.

informative and direct

I now know how to engage with myself and those with traumatic situations. Must read.